ARKHAM
It's home sweet home for Harley Quinn when the Bat hauls her butt back to the Asylum. Having home-court advantage, she's ready to bust out in less than 24 hours - but when she finds out Hugo Strange is experimenting on her former patients, will she remember her Hippocratic Oath?
FADE IN:
EXT. ARKHAM ASYLUM - NIGHT
'ARKHAM', written in iron, swoops up from left to right. Beyond it, lightning streaks across dark clouds. We PULL BACK to see the word 'ASYLUM' swooping down beside it: the arched sign above the front gate. We CONTINUE TO PULL BACK to see the winding drive beyond the gate and the ominous structure of the asylum itself like a Gothic castle atop a hill.
We hear the THRUM of a powerful engine, getting louder as it approaches. The GATE OPENS and the BATMOBILE races through. The GATE CLOSES as the Batmobile speeds toward the building.
INT. ARKHAM - ADMISSIONS OFFICE - NIGHT
AARON CASH, a large and burly man, has worked at the asylum for many years, long enough to be named CHIEF OF SECURITY. His grizzled face shows numerous scars and he has a HOOK IN PLACE OF his LEFT HAND.
Cash is staring at a bank of monitors as FOUR YOUNGER GUARDS play poker at a table behind him. Cash's eyes narrow at what he sees on the monitors.
CASH
(gruffly)
On the clock.
The younger guards slap down their cards and get to their feet, moving toward the monitors. DAVE gapes at them.
DAVE
Is that the Bat?
CASH
If he's bringing them in
personally, they're
dangerous. Dave, Barney,
you've got the tasers.
Brian, you've got the
tranquilizer gun.
Charlie, live rounds.
And no lethal shots or
you'll answer to the Bat
yourself.
Dave, BARNEY, and BRIAN have all gotten their weapons without a word. CHARLIE pulls a pistol from his waist and ejects the clip. He replaces it with a clip from his belt and chambers a round.
CHARLIE
You got it, Chief.
2.
All of them move toward the tempered glass doors. Cash, in the center, is the only one not holding a weapon though several hang from his belt, as well as a KEYRING. He stands with his hands on his hips as he and the others look out.
The Batmobile lurches to a halt outside. BATMAN leaps out so quickly we see only the swish of a cape and the silhouette of the cowl.
Cash's eyes widen and he takes in a swift, deep breath.
CASH
Oh no.
He and the other guards look out in disbelief as we hear a STRUGGLE outside, the JINGLE OF CHAINS and the THUDS of blows landing. Both Batman and HARLEY QUINN occasionally grunt. Her voice starts out from far away but gets louder and closer.
HARLEY
Lousy bat! I'll rip off your
pointy ears and shove 'em up
your-
We hear a SPLAT and the guards jump in surprise.
The pale, tattooed face of Harley Quinn is smushed against the glass door. Her hands are cuffed and a chain leads down to her legs. She peels her face off of the glass and stretches her jaw before snapping her teeth together in a vicious grin. She LEAPS away from the door.
Cash's face goes from shock to anger as we hear the struggle recommence: thudding blows and jingling chains, BATMAN SHOUTS in pain and HARLEY CACKLES out a laugh.
CASH
Secure her!
The younger guards rush to join the fight outside. Cash keys the mic at his right shoulder and speaks into it.
CASH
This is Cash at the
Admissions Gate. Somebody
call Dr. Leland.
NURSE (O.S.)
You want me to wake the
Director in the middle of
the night?
CASH
Trust me, she's going to
want to know about this.
3.
OVERLAPPING this conversation we can hear the fight outside:
CHARLIE (O.S.)
Taze her!
From Harley's undulating voice we can tell she's in constant motion, presenting as difficult a target as possible.
HARLEY (O.S.)
Whoa, whoa! No! Don't
taze me, bro!
We hear the CRACKLE of electricity.
HARLEY (O.S.) (CONT'D)
Ha! He missed!
BARNEY (O.S.)
Oh, geez, sorry, Dave!
Cash looks out and shakes his head wearily with a groan.
INT. ARKHAM - CELL BLOCK A - CORRIDOR
We hear 'BASTARD'S BLUES' by BROTHER DEGE as we TRUCK LEFT down the high-ceilinged hall. The aging plaster on the walls is cracking out near perfect outlines of the cinder blocks beneath it. Every eight feet is an 8x8' sheet of glass, beyond which is a padded cell, each with a keypad set in the wall beside it.
A wheelchair moves along the hospital-clean concrete floor. Handcuffed to the wheelchair is Harley, stripped of her signature pigtails and wearing an orange jumpsuit with the Arkham emblem on the chest. She is unconscious.
Cash, Charlie, and Brian walk alongside the wheelchair, which is being pushed by a heavy-set ORDERLY. Harley wakes up blearily and yawns. She looks around and sighs out a groan.
HARLEY
Be it ever so humble...
She sees Cash and smiles.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
Hiya, Cash! How they
hangin'? (beat) Lower
every year, right?
She winks at him as she laughs. His left eye twitches as he looks down at her.
4.
CASH
(through gritted teeth)
Quinn.
They stop in front of a cell. Standing there is DR. JOAN LELAND, the current DIRECTOR of the asylum. She wears a white lab coat and a deep frown which accentuates the VERTICAL SCAR which RUNS DOWN her RIGHT CHEEK from the outer corner of her eye. Her arms are crossed.
HARLEY
Hey, boss! Long time, no see!
JOAN
Harleen.
The Orderly takes his keys from around his neck and slips a CARD into the keypad. He types in a four-digit code and the glass slides up. He pushes the wheelchair into the cell and steps back to the panel.
Brian aims his tranquilizer gun at the back of Harley's neck as Cash and Charlie move to either side of her. They unlock her handcuffs simultaneously and step back quickly.
CASH
Move.
Harley stands up and steps forward. Brian, his weapon still trained on her, sidesteps enough for the Orderly to remove the wheelchair. Cash and Charlie step out of the cell and the Orderly types in the same code. The glass slides back down and Harley turns around.
HARLEY
Home sweet home.
Cash waves a hand dismissively and the Orderly and other guards walk away.
JOAN
I'm disappointed to see you
here, Harleen. After seeing
you on the news, I actually
dared to hope you had turned
over a new leaf.
HARLEY
But I did! I have! I just
ran into some old friends,
then we ran into some old
enemies... you know how it
is.
5.
JOAN
Know how it is? You set them
on fire!
HARLEY
Well, I was going to put
'em out!
JOAN
When?
Harley tries to keep a straight face but a laugh starts leaking out her nose.
HARLEY
When the marshmallows were
done!
She lets out a loud cackle. Joan groans and shakes her head.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
What? I can't help it, you
give me a set up like that!
JOAN
That's the problem, Harleen,
you can't help it! You take
the joke too far! You need
help.
Harley sobers up and swallows. She nods.
HARLEY
You're right, Joan. I could
use some Clozapine. Some
Lithium, of course. Ooh, I
heard about a new-
JOAN
No, this is not a case of
'physician heal thyself'.
No medication for 24 hours
since I don't know what
you've been - medicating
yourself with. And your
new doctor will prescribe
medication after that.
She's young, but gifted.
Like you used to be.
These words sober Harley even more, she looks hurt. She twists her hair with her index fingers.
HARLEY
Could I get some hair-ties?
CASH
(sternly)
No!
6.
JOAN
We remember what you can
do with hair-ties.
HARLEY
Huh? (beat) Oh, yeah!
Harley laughs again but covers her mouth with her hand, trying to suppress it as she looks at Cash.
HARLEY
Sorry about that, Cash.
Cash's neck clenches and he rubs a hand across his throat.
JOAN
You'll meet with your doctor
after breakfast. Try to get
some sleep.
Joan and Cash walk away. Harley presses against the glass to see them for as long as she can.
HARLEY
Yeah, I'll see you later!
And I'll take care of that
new doctor for you! I mean,
help her! Take her under my
wing, you know what I mean!
All you got to do is ask,
Joan, anything you want!
Cash and Joan both sigh as they walk.
CASH
(softly)
You really think Strawberry
Shortcake is ready for her?
JOAN
Don't call her - is that
what people are saying?
CASH
Not to my face, but I hear
them.
JOAN
Well, don't say it to my
face either... though it is
funny.
They glance sidelong at each other and chuckle.
7.
INT. ARKHAM - JOAN'S OFFICE - DAY
STRAWBERRY SHORT - I mean - DR. EDITH LAFFERTY walks through the door beaming her usual sincere smile. Edith is a petite young woman with vibrantly red hair. She wears dark-rimmed glasses and a long, old-fashioned dress beneath her lab coat. Though not exactly fat, there is no denying she looks as plump and soft as a stuffed doll.
EDITH
Good morning, Dr. Leland!
Joan looks up from the file on her desk. She looks tired. So does the office, bearing the scars of numerous asylum uprisings. There are traces of green graffiti on the walls and the entire left half of the desk is marred and shows fire damage.
JOAN
Morning, Edith. Sit down.
Edith sits in front of her as Joan turns the file and slides it toward her.
JOAN (CONT'D)
New case.
Edith looks at it eagerly and gasps excitedly.
EDITH
Oh my God! You know I wrote
my thesis on her!
JOAN
I know. But be careful. I
don't envy you having to get
inside her psyche. And don't
let her inside yours.
EDITH
Of course! I won't let you
down, Dr. Leland!
Edith scoops up the file and rushes out the door. Joan sighs and shakes her head.
INT. ARKHAM - THERAPY ROOM 17 - DAY
Harley is handcuffed to a metal chair, so that she has to lean her head down to twirl her hair with her index finger. She is currently doing the left side.
8.
HARLEY
Young and gifted. Like you
used to be. Like I used to
be.
She switches to the right side.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
Like I used to be? Implying
I ain't gifted no more?
I'm gifted, I got gifts! I
got gifts that'll fuck up
your face, bitch!
She GASPS and switches back to the lift side.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
Don't say that about Joan!
She's a good person! She
was a good boss, a good
friend, she's trying to
help you!
She stops twirling her hair.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
I mean me - us?
She looks confused for a moment, maybe a little worried. She reaches a decision and smiles.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
I mean me.
The door opens and she looks up. Edith walks in, smiling as usual. She speaks to Dave, who opened the heavy metal door for her, then Harley.
EDITH
Thank you, David. Hello!
She looks up, beyond Harley.
EDITH (CONT'D)
You can wait outside the
door, Charles.
Harley turns toward him and looks up.
HARLEY
Yeah, good talk, Chuck.
Charlie, who has been standing there the whole time, looks down at her with his mouth slightly agape. He edges toward the door, never taking his eyes off her.
9.
CHARLIE
Alright, Dr. Lafferty,
just... be careful.
Edith sits at the table opposite Harley. The table is in the center of the green-tiled room, in the corners are wheeled shelves containing thick binders and sunlight streams through horizontal blinds. Edith looks back at Charlie.
EDITH
I'll be fine.
Charlie shuts the door as he leaves. Edith smiles at Harley.
EDITH (CONT'D)
I hope that we will
eventually be friends, but
for the first few sessions
I would prefer you called
me 'Dr. Lafferty'.
HARLEY
(sincerely)
You got it, Doc Laffs, total
respect. And you can call me
Harley, everybody does.
Edith is stunned for a moment.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
So how long you been
crackin' nuts?
EDITH
I've... been here almost a
month.
Harley chuckles.
HARLEY
Bet you ain't even been
through a break-out yet, huh?
EDITH
A break-out? No, of course
not!
Edith opens the file and readies a pencil.
EDITH (CONT'D)
I suppose you witnessed a -
break-out - when you were a
doctor here?
Harley chuckles again, a little more evilly.
HARLEY
On occasion.
10.
We hear 'HAPPY HOLIDAYS' by ANDY WILLIAMS as we enter into a montage of holidays at Arkham Asylum.
INT. ARKHAM - REC ROOM - YEARS AGO
HARLEEN QUINZEL, Harley before the bleaching and tattoos, is standing against the wall with several other staff members: nurses, orderlies, etc. She is wearing glasses and a lab coat, her hair pulled back in a ponytail. She and the others are all terrified.
JOKER (O.C.)
Merry Christmas! Open you
present!
There is a BOOM and Harleen and the others JUMP AND SHOUT. The music is silenced by the explosion.
JOKER (O.C.) (CONT'D)
What do you know, another
exploding present! What are
the odds? Ha, ha, ha, ha,
ha! You got me! They all
explode!
A small, gift-wrapped box is tossed to Harleen, she fumbles with it for a moment before securing it.
JOKER (O.C.) (CONT'D)
(cruelly)
Now open yours.
Harleen looks up in terror as her coworkers inch away from her.
LATER
A very similar scene of Harleen and her coworkers against the wall except this time their hands are tied and they are wearing silver conical hats.
RIDDLER (O.C.)
Riddle me this! Twelve
disciples have I, for one
to live the last must die.
A SHOTGUN held by a green-sleeved arm jabs toward Harleen's face, stopping within inches. She quakes in fear.
RIDDLER (O.C.) (CONT'D)
What am I?
Harleen is trembling like a leaf in a hurricane.
11.
HARLEEN
A - a year?
Riddler gasps in mock surprise.
RIDDLER (O.C.)
Happy New Year, Dr.
Quinzel, you get to live.
The shotgun moves to the person on her right.
RIDDLER (O.C.) (CONT'D)
But I've got a tough one
for you.
LATER
A very different scene though Harleen still stands terrified against the wall. THORNY VINES SNAKE ACROSS the FLOOR and up the wall, ENTRAPPING her COWORKERS to either side of her.
HARLEEN
H-h-happy Earth day!
The vines advancing toward her pause.
IVY (O.C.)
Just stay down, doc.
Harleen nods her head as if she's shivering and shrinks down into a crouch.
LATER
VICTOR (O.C.)
Happy Fourth of July!
Harleen and the others all SCREAM and try to scatter but a BLAST OF WHITE FROST shoots out and envelops them. When it clears we see they are FROZEN IN PLACE, the only thing moving is Harleen's eyes behind her glasses.
LATER
This scene is complete bedlam, with Harleen and the others screaming, running, writhing on the floor, shooing off invisible threats. We hear the sadistic laughter of SCARECROW.
JOKER (O.C.)
You've got to hand it to
him, nobody throws a
Halloween party like
Scarecrow!
12.
Joker laughs, joined by the iconic SQUAWKING of the PENGUIN. We hear the final line of 'IT'S THE MOST WONDERFUL TIME OF THE YEAR' by ANDY WILLIAMS.
INT. THERAPY ROOM 17
Edith is staring at Harley with her mouth open and her eyes wide. She closes her mouth and clears her throat.
EDITH
That must have been...
very traumatizing.
Harley shrugs, her upturned palms going as high as the handcuffs will allow.
HARLEY
Heh, goes with the territory.
EDITH
But I'm a little confused...
you said 'break-out'. If
they got out of their cells,
even got weapons - why
didn't they just leave?
HARLEY
Ha! I remember askin' Joan
the same thing! She didn't
really know either, but now
that I've seen both sides of
it, I think I get it.
INT. TWO-FACE'S CELL - DAY
TWO-FACE is pacing back and forth. Though we can't hear him, we see he is having an animated conversation with himself.
HARLEY (V.O.)
No matter the individual
psychosis...
INT. PENGUIN'S CELL - DAY
PENGUIN's cell is in an older section of the asylum and has a barred window. A BIRD flies in and lands on his knee. He smiles and feeds it some bird seed from his open palm.
HARLEY (V.O.)
Pretty much everybody in
here, including yours
truly...
13.
INT. FIREFLY'S CELL - DAY
GARFIELD LYNNS, AKA FIREFLY, is punching the wall of his cell, pure hatred written on his FIRE-SCARRED FACE.
HARLEY (V.O.)
HATES authority.
INT. ARKHAM - CAFETERIA - DAY
Inmates holding trays move in a line through the dining area. Guards holding clubs stand around, watching them.
HARLEY (V.O.)
And authority?
An INMATE STUMBLES and bumps into a guard. The GUARD SHOVES HIM, causing the tray of food to splatter across the floor. The inmate gets angry and the GUARD CLUBS HIM in the head. The inmate hits the ground and the guard continues to club him. Other guards rush over to 'help'.
HARLEY (V.O.) (CONT'D)
Well, authority hates us
right back, don't it?
INT. PENGUIN'S CELL - DAY
Penguin walks the bird, now perched on his finger, to the window and it flies away. Penguin looks out at a very rare sight in Gotham City: a blue sky.
HARLEY (V.O.)
When people like us think
about freedom, we ain't
dreamin' about blue skies
and green grass...
INT. TWO-FACE'S CELL - DAY
Though we still can't hear the words, Two-Face is arguing with himself. His mouth on the bad side is starting to foam.
HARLEY (V.O.)
(increasing intensity)
We're dreamin' about hot,
sticky-red vengeance,
gushing over our hands and
spillin' down the front of
ANYBODY who ever DARED to-
14.
INT. THERAPY ROOM 17
HARLEY
-are you alright, Doc?
Edith is looking at her, the pencil frozen in her hand. The only thing moving is her lower lip, it's trembling slightly. She closes her mouth and swallows.
EDITH
Yeah. Yes, of course. Goes
with the territory, right?
HARLEY
Now you're gettin' it!
(beat) What was I sayin'?
Edith looks at the file in front of her.
EDITH
Uh - hot - stick - actually,
let's move on...
She flips through a few pages of the file and reads. Harley chuckles.
HARLEY
That's some damn good file
work.
EDITH
I'm sorry?
HARLEY
Come on, level with me. You
know every word of that file
by heart, don't you?
Edith almost blushes and smiles.
EDITH
Yes.
HARLEY
You see, the file's just a
prop. This whole thing is
like a performance. Only
your smarter patients, see
they have a script of their
own. And your script has to
be designed to push them off
script, get 'em ad-libbing.
They're still lying to you,
of course, but if you catch
'em off guard, sometimes a
little truth slips through.
15.
INT. THERAPY ROOM 17 - YEARS AGO - DAY
We hear 'CRAZY' by LARA PRICE. Sitting in front of Harleen is SELINA KYLE, AKA CATWOMAN, not handcuffed and dabbing her eyes with a tissue. Harleen looks sympathetic.
HARLEEN
That was a really heart-felt
story.
SELINA
Thank you.
HARLEEN
But I can't help think...
didn't you tell me your
mother's name was 'Sara'?
Selina freezes. Harleen flips through the pages of the file in front of her.
HARLEEN (CONT'D)
Yes. In our first session,
you told me your mother's
name was Sara. But in that -
very touching story - your
grandmother called her
'Kate'.
SELINA
Well... Grandma was getting
old-
HARLEEN
I'm going to put my cards on
the table here, Selina. As
skilled as you are at
stealing, you not a
kleptomaniac. And as much as
you love cats, you do not
believe you actually are
one. You are sane. You don't
belong here. My only
question is how you
convinced a judge and jury
that you did.
Harleen flips through the file again as Selina watches, speechless.
HARLEEN (CONT'D)
All based on the testimony
of a Doctor - see, I have
trouble believing this is
even a real person much
less a doctor - Strange?
His name is Strange?
SELINA
Yes, his name is Strange.
16.
HARLEEN
I'm pretty sure that's a
comic book character.
SELINA
No, he's a real doctor!
When speaking sarcastically, we can hear something of the Lower Gotham accent in Harleen's voice.
HARLEEN
(sarcastically)
Who wrote his diploma,
Stan Lee? Was it the
University of Excelsior?
SELINA
No, he is a very well
respected doctor! Who -
Selina sort of looks around and licks her lips.
SELINA (CONT'D)
(softly)
Who was running some
very expensive
experiments.
HARLEEN
Ah!
SELINA
(softly)
What about you, Dr.
Quinzel? Are you running
any - expensive
experiments?
Harleen looks at her for a moment, a slight smile playing over her lips. She eventually shakes her head slightly and closes the file.
HARLEEN
No. You don't have to bribe
me. I have no interest in
sending you to Blackgate.
But in our future sessions,
I would appreciate it if you
would be honest with me.
SELINA
(confused)
But... you just said I was
sane. Why would I need more
sessions?
17.
HARLEEN
Sane is not the same as
mentally healthy. Have you
ever told anyone the truth?
Selina looks offended.
HARLEEN (CONT'D)
About your mother?
Selina looks shocked. Harleen pushes the file away.
HARLEEN (CONT'D)
No notes. No prescriptions;
you don't need them.
She pushes away the prescription pad and places her hands flat on the table.
HARLEEN (CONT'D)
But you do need to talk.
To someone. And I'm right
here.
Selina looks at her. She swallows.
SELINA
I can remember her calling
me Selina... but Kyle was
just some boy I met in a
shelter I stayed in one
time. I just liked the
sound of it.
Selina tries to smile but starts to look like she might really need a tissue soon.
SELINA
She left... I was so you
when she left... I never
knew her name, first or
last.
INT. THERAPY ROOM 17 - PRESENT
HARLEY
And when you do get
someone to tell the truth,
it is such a good feeling.
Like blow-a-bank-vault
good. And I want you to
feel that with me! Only
you don't need C-4 to get
in here, I'm wide open!
So, no more jokes, no
lies, go ahead and shoot,
Doc!
18.
EDITH
Alright! (beat) How did
Joker get you to fall in
love with him?
HARLEY
(really hurt)
Ow! Geez, Doc, how 'bout a
little foreplay next time!
EDITH
I'm sorry, you're right,
that's too soon-
HARLEY
No, no, no! It's fine. I
said truth, we're going
with truth.
She lets out a deep breath.
INT. THERAPY ROOM 17 - YEARS AGO/PRESENT
KILLER CROC is sitting before Harleen, with heavy-duty shackles instead of handcuffs. He snarls at her though we can hear only Harley's voice over.
HARLEY (V.O.)
The reason I was so good
at this job...
We PAN LEFT to Harleen, speaking calmly with care in her eyes.
HARLEY (V.O.)
Is because when everyone
else just saw a monster...
We PAN RIGHT to Croc, who sniffs and runs a scaly hand across his eyes.
HARLEY (V.O.)
I could see the human
inside.
We TRUCK AROUND BEHIND HARLEEN to see JOKER, in a straight-jacket, sitting in the chair. He smiles knowingly as he speaks. The ROOM DARKENS as we CONTINUE TO TRUCK AROUND them.
HARLEY (V.O.)
And the reason Joker got to
me so easily...
We PAN RIGHT to Harleen, hanging on Joker's every word.
19.
HARLEY (V.O.)
Is 'cause while everybody
else just saw a human...
We TRUCK AROUND BEHIND JOKER to see Harleen grinning viciously. UNDERLIGHTING casts eerie shadows on her face.
HARLEY (V.O.)
He always knew the real
reason I was so good at
talking to monsters.
We PAN RIGHT to Harley, sitting in the chair. Our perspective stops moving.
HARLEY
The Joker didn't make
Harley Quinn. He just
let her out.
We PAN LEFT to Edith, who sits speechless. The lighting returns to normal. She eventually blinks.
EDITH
Thank you, Harley. I
think that is enough for
today.
She closes the file and stands.
EDITH (CONT'D)
I'll send Charles in to
return you to your room.
She walks toward the door.
HARLEY
Ooh, what about my meds?
EDITH
I'll discuss it with Dr.
Leland.
HARLEY
Cool, cool. Say hi for me!
Edith knocks and the door is opened for her.
INT. JOAN'S OFFICE - DAY
Joan is asleep in her chair. Edith walks in.
EDITH
Dr. Leland?
Joan wakes up instantly. Edith gasps and starts to back out of the room.
20.
EDITH (CONT'D)
Oh, I'm sorry.
JOAN
It's fine, Edith, come in.
(beat) What's the verdict?
Edith closes the door and sits down.
EDITH
I'm not sure. She seems to
want to go through the
process.
JOAN
But you don't believe her?
EDITH
She seems sincere, but...
was there any history of
violence before the Joker?
There was nothing in the
file, but I know you
worked with her.
Joan thinks a moment.
JOAN
There were times she
defended herself when
necessary but no, she
never showed signs of
aggression.
EDITH
What about before she
worked here? I guess she
would have never been hired
if that was the case, never
mind.
JOAN
Actually... I wasn't
Director then, but as a
Supervisor I was a part of
the hiring process. And
there was something on her
record, as a juvenile, but
the Director at the time
decided to overlook it. At
the time I was glad he did.
EDITH
What was it?
JOAN
You would have to ask her.
I was never privy to the
exact nature of the incident
and when I was putting that
file together for you I
couldn't find anything about
it.
21.
Edith chews her lip thoughtfully for a moment.
EDITH
You think... never mind.
(beat) You said, 'at the
time' you were glad. Do you
wish she had never been
hired?
Joan barks out a short laugh.
JOAN
Well, that would be a pretty
foolish wish. Harleen
Quinzel saved my life.
EDITH
(shocked)
What?
INT. REC ROOM - YEARS AGO
Harleen and Joan, before the scar, stand against the wall. They're wearing party hats and Harleen is holding a piece of cake on a paper plate in one hand and a plastic fork in the other. She is too terrified to take a bite.
Two-Face is standing before them, his DOUBLE-BARRELED PISTOL in one hand and his coin in the other. TWO GOONS with shotguns, one left-handed and one right, stand behind and on either side of him.
TWO-FACE:GOOD SIDE
Happy birthday, Dr. Leland!
Now what should we give you
for a present?
He holds up the coin and turns it to show the bad side.
TWO-FACE:BAD SIDE
Bad side, we bludgeon your
brains out!
He turns the coin to show the good side.
TWO-FACE:GOOD SIDE
Good side, we just use a
bullet!
He flips the coin high into the air. Both Harleen and Joan follow the path of the coin with their eyes. As it starts to come down, Harleen drops the cake and lunges forward, catching the coin in mid-air.
22.
HARLEEN
Wait!
Two-Face points the pistol in her face and the goons both level their shotguns.
TWO-FACE:BAD SIDE
Hey! What's the idea?
Harleen looks back and forth between his left and right eyes as she speaks.
HARLEEN
Hey, hey, now you both know
I can be trusted with the
coin.
TWO-FACE:BAD SIDE
This isn't therapy, this is
real life!
HARLEEN
Exactly! And I am stopping
you from making a big
mistake. I mean, kill her
or kill her? That's not
justice.
TWO-FACE:GOOD SIDE
But it's the only thing we
agree on.
TWO-FACE:BAD SIDE
Yeah, even goody two-shoes
thinks she should eat a
bullet.
Harleen holds up the coin, showing the good side, and looks into his right eye.
HARLEEN
Fine, fine, good side she
eats a bullet, quick and
clean.
She turns over the coin to show the bad side and looks into his left eye, the hint of a naughty smile on her face.
HARLEEN (CONT'D)
But if it's bad side we
can get messy.
TWO-FACE:BAD SIDE
Bludgeoning!
HARLEEN
Better.
23.
TWO-FACE:BAD SIDE
(suspiciously)
Better than bludgeoning?
HARLEEN
What is even worse than
death?
Two-Face considers for a moment.
HARLEEN (CONT'D)
I happen to know there is
some muriatic acid in the
lab.
Two-Face's eyes light up. He snatches the coin from Harleen.
TWO-FACE:BAD SIDE
Make her like us! That is
worse than death!
TWO-FACE:GOOD SIDE
Yes! We like it! But,
Harleen, no matter how good
that idea is, you
interrupted a coin toss.
TWO-FACE:BAD SIDE
So you're next.
HARLEEN
That's fine. As long as it's
fair, fifty-fifty is fine
with me.
TWO-FACE:BAD SIDE
To the lab!
He leads the way. The goons grab the doctors by the elbows and follow.
JOAN
(hissing)
Harleen! What are you doing?
HARLEEN
(hissing)
My job!
INT. LAB
The goons are still holding the doctors by the elbows. Two-Face is gleefully pouring acid into a beaker.
TWO-FACE:BAD SIDE
Isn't it beautiful? The same
stuff that made us the man
we are today!
24.
TWO-FACE:GOOD SIDE
Which side should we do?
Two-Face considers.
TWO-FACE:BAD SIDE
The right! She'll be our
opposite! Hold her down,
boys!
Joan begins to struggle but is no match for the strength of the goon. There is a CRASH and they all look toward the door.
Cash and TWO MORE GUARDS rush in. Cash is holding a TASER and FIRES it into the goon holding Joan.
Harleen uses the distraction to grab an empty beaker and smash it into the face of the goon holding her. He is temporarily blinded and one of the guards grabs his gun from him and hits him in the head with it, knocking him out.
Two-Face pulls his pistol and fires at Cash, but Cash ducks for cover behind a table. The other guard shoots Two-Face in the shoulder; there is no blood as it is a rubber bullet, but he drops the pistol. He grabs the acid with his right hand and Joan's throat with his left. Holding her in front of him, he backs to the wall, the acid near her face.
TWO-FACE:GOOD SIDE
Alright, everybody calm
down!
Harleen holds up a hand as she inches toward Two-Face.
HARLEEN
That's acid, Cash!
TWO-FACE:BAD SIDE
It sure is! And you're
making us nervous! Look
at our hand shake!
He shakes the beaker so that the ACID SPLASHES around inside. A drop splashes out and lands on Joan's cheek just by the outside corner of her right eye. JOAN SCREAMS.
Everyone rushes Two-Face; Harleen, who is closest, knocks the acid from his hand and pulls Joan away as the GUARDS TACKLE HIM.
Harleen rushes Joan to an eyewash station and pushes her head down into the water. JOAN IS STILL SCREAMING when she isn't panting for breath.
HARLEEN
It's OK! It's going to be OK!
25.
INT. JOAN'S OFFICE - DAY
Edith is once again stunned into speechlessness.
JOAN
Yeah, it was risky. But if
she hadn't done anything, I
wouldn't be here. As many
times as she's given me
reason to, I can never give
up on that woman. But at
the same time, I know I'm
not the one that can help
her. I'm too close. You
might be her best hope.
Edith swallows and nods.
JOAN (CONT'D)
Did you ask her how the
Joker turned her?
EDITH
No. Not yet.
JOAN
Good. Give her time to
trust you.
Edith nods again. Joan yawns and looks at her watch.
JOAN (CONT'D)
Have you had lunch yet?
Edith shakes her head. Joan stands and puts on her lab coat.
JOAN (CONT'D)
Let's grab a bite and talk
about a course of
medication. Dosage can be
tricky with her, she has a
high tolerance for virtually
everything.
INT. ARKHAM - MAIN HALLWAY - DAY
Joan and Edith are walking toward the cafeteria. At the other end of the hall, Harley is walking from it. Behind her are Charlie, on her left, Barney, on her right, and Brian, directly behind her and several feet away.
Harley sees the doctors and smiles. She waves as best she can, her wrists and ankles are chained so her hand stays at waist level.
Edith smiles and waves back, Joan smiles a little stiffly and inclines her head.
26.
BRIAN
(softly)
Strawberry Shortcake.
Barney snickers. Harley looks a little confused. After taking a closer look at Edith, Harley starts to look angry.
HOPPING FORWARD to get a few feet ahead of her guards, Harley THROWS HERSELF IN A ROLL at Charlie's feet. He TOPPLES FORWARD, TRIPPING over her.
On her feet in an instant, she torpedoes herself at Barney, PLOWING her SHOULDER INTO his GUT. She stands suddenly, the top of her head UPPER-CUTTING his chin with enough force to take him OFF his FEET. We hear running footsteps.
JOAN (O.C.)
Harleen, Harleen, stop!
EDITH (O.C.)
(overlapping)
No, no, Harley, don't, don't!
Harley LAUNCHES herself BACKWARD into Brian, the taser he just pulled from his waist falls from his hand as they both hit the floor. She gets behind him as he tries to get to his feet, the chain between her wrists around his neck. She is crouched behind him, her head next to his.
Joan and Edith have gotten there by this time. Harley wrenches Brian's face around so that he's looking at Edith.
HARLEY
(shouting)
Her name is DOC LAFFS! And
you will treat her with
respect! Or you will answer
to me!
She leans forward enough for him to see her at the last line, and Charlie SHOOTS a DART INTO her NECK. She looks up like someone called her name or tapped her on the shoulder.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
Huh?
Another DART is SHOT INTO her CHEST. She looks down at it.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
Oh.
She keels over, dragging Brian with her to the floor.
27.
INT. BEDROOM - ANIMATED SERIES UNIVERSE
CARTOON HARLEY, wearing her harlequin costume, awakens on a round bed in a dark room. She sits up and rubs her head, confused when she finds bells.
HARLEY
What am I doing in this
get-up?
She gets out of bed and looks for a light switch. She finds one and clicks it on. She looks down at herself and SHRIEKS.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
I'm a cartoon! (beat)
I've always wanted to
be a cartoon!
She jumps on the bed and bounces around for a while until she sees her MALLET leaning against the wall. She GASPS.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
I wonder if I bashed myself
in the head I'd see little
tweety birds!
She leaps off the bed and picks up the mallet, preparing to bash herself with it.
JOKER (O.S.)
Harley!
She looks at the open doorway and scowls.
HARLEY
Aw, nuts, it's a rerun.
She puts the mallet over her shoulder and walks to the door.
JOKER (O.S.)
(impatiently)
Harley!
HARLEY
Yeah, yeah, keep your shirt
on.
INT. FUNHOUSE - ANIMATED SERIES UNIVERSE
CARTOON JOKER and THREE STOOGES, MO, LAR, and CUR, are standing amidst distorting mirrors and arcade games. In the center, stuffed into an oversized birdcage, is COMMISIONER GORDON. Harley walks in, swinging her mallet around and spinning it like a baton.
HARLEY
Yeah, what do you want?
28.
JOKER
Harley, there you are! Look
over this script, I want
everyone ready for when
Batman gets here and I
skewer Gordon right in
front of him.
Harley takes the piece of paper Lar hands her and smiles at Gordon in the cage.
HARLEY
How you doin', commish?
GORDON
Fuck off, Quinn.
HARLEY
Fair enough.
She reads the paper.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
So, you're like a magician...
JOKER
Oh, I'm going to need my
top hat!
Lar goes to fetch the hat as Harley reads.
HARLEY
And I'm your lovely
assistant. 'The Great
Joker the Magnificent - '
you sure you want two
'the's? I'm all for going
over the top but that
just sounds sloppy.
JOKER
Well... shorten it to
'Joker the Magnificent'
but then add something
about how great I am.
HARLEY
Right. Then I put the
blanket over the cage...
this blanket?
She knows it's that blanket; it's colored differently than the rest of the background.
29.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
Then I just hand you
swords and make 'ooh'
faces every time he
screams - Hey, make sure
not to puncture his lungs
too fast or there won't
be no screamin' and I'll
just be standin' there
lookin' stupid!
JOKER
Oh, Harley, it's not like
it's my first time... hey,
where is that barrel of
swords?
As he is looking around, BATGIRL swoops down, SWINGING ON A ROPE, and KICKS him in the FACE with both feet. He goes down.
HARLEY
What the heck is that?
Batgirl, landing a few feet away from the sprawled out Joker, THROWS BATARANGS at Harley, one, two, three. Harley DODGES two and BLOCKS the third with her mallet.
Joker gets to a crouch and tries to sweep Batgirl's legs but she CARTWHEELS away. Joker stands.
JOKER
It's Batgirl! Get her!
Mo and Cur advance on Batgirl. Harley laughs.
HARLEY
A Batgirl? This dream
just got wacky!
JOKER
Don't just stand there,
get her!
He grabs Harley by the shoulder and SHOVES her toward the fight. She rounds on him angrily.
HARLEY
Hey! You don't tell me
what to do anymore!
She swings her mallet at his head. He ducks and backs away, shocked.
JOKER
Harley! Are you crazy?
Her eyes widen in disbelief.
30.
HARLEY
(furious)
Of course, I'm crazy! That
was your whole damn plan,
remember?
She attacks him in earnest, swinging her mallet and kicking. His shock soon gives way to anger and he grabs her by the bell on her head and SWINGS her AROUND by it, HURLING her into Batgirl, who is still fighting stooges.
Harley and Batgirl look at each other.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
Oh, quit clowning around
with these bozos! We got
the king bozo to deal with!
Harley attacks the stooges. Batgirl, after a quick double-take, helps her. She LEAPS INTO a FLYING KICK aimed at Lar, who has come up behind Harley, but HE DODGES it and she lands behind him.
Lar raises both hands, preparing to smash Harley with a double fist but Batgirl tosses a rope around his wrists. She then RUNS THE ROPE AROUND, clotheslining Mo and Cur.
Harley sees what she's doing and CARTWHEELS AWAY as the rope encircles the three stooges. She JUMPS BACK and BONKS them each on the head and they are left unconscious and tied up.
Harley and Batgirl nod to each other and turn toward Joker, who is backing away.
JOKER
Hey, now, come on, girls...
two against one really
isn't fair-
Batgirl tosses a rope around his ankles as Harley LEAPS at him, JABBING the MALLET straight into his jaw. FREEZE FRAME.
POW! fills the screen. We hear MUSIC FROM the '66 BATMAN.
JOKER (O.S.)
Hey, not the face!
FREEZE FRAME (comically drawn): Joker's head bent back, missing teeth. Beyond him, a grinning Harley has just swung her mallet and Batgirl, with a satisfied smile on her face, stands with her arms crossed.
YANK! fills the screen.
JOKER (O.S.)
Not the hair!
31.
FREEZE FRAME: Joker, with tears streaming down his cheeks, is holding his scalp. Above him, Harley holds a handful of green hair and Batgirl is covering her mouth like she's giggling.
RACK! fills the screen.
JOKER (O.S.)
(anguished)
Not the scrotum!
FREEZE FRAME: Joker, on his knees and holding his groin, Harley and Batgirl on either side of him pointing and laughing.
DISSOLVE TO:
Harley and Batgirl are pointing at Joker and laughing, he is on his knees holding his groin. He keels over with a GROAN.
HARLEY
I know you're just a
manifestation of my
superego, but thanks.
BATGIRL
Huh?
BATMAN (O.S.)
Batgirl, look out!
They both tense for action. A batarang strikes Harley in the head. Her EYES GO OUT OF FOCUS and she barely manages to raise one middle finger before FALLING BACKWARD.
INT. BEDROOM - HARLEY QUINN SHOW UNIVERSE
Cartoon Harley, better drawn this time and wearing a sheer nightie, sits up in bed and rubs her head. Beside her, POISON IVY, also wearing a nightie, sits up and stretches with a yawn. Harley whips her head around in shock.
HARLEY
Ivy?
IVY
Morning, babe.
Ivy goes to kiss her. Harley JERKS BACK.
HARLEY
What the-
Harley FALLS OUT OF the BED. Ivy looks confused. She breathes into her hand and sniffs it to check her morning breath.
32.
IVY
Harley? Are you alright?
Harley gets to her feet instantly.
HARLEY
Yep.
She looks at her clothes and Ivy's.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
So, what's going on? We
havin' a slumber party
or somethin'?
IVY
Slumber party? Did you
hit your head?
Harley rubs her head and thinks.
HARLEY
No, but the Batman - no,
wait! Of course, I'm
still dreaming!
IVY
You think you're dreaming?
HARLEY
Of course, that's why I'm
still a cartoon!
IVY
And you think you're a
cartoon again - oh, God,
you're not going to do
that thing where you bash
yourself in the head trying
to see tweety birds, are you?
HARLEY
No! There wouldn't be tweety
birds here, the drawing's
too good.
She looks at her hands and waves them really fast.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
See? In regular cartoons
they just use wavy lines
when you move real fast.
Ivy looks at her with a pained expression. She's still waving her arms and looking at them closely.
33.
IVY
Harley, when was the last
time you took your meds?
HARLEY
Oh, no, Joan said no
medication for 24 hours.
IVY
Joan? Leland? From Arkham-
Harls, we haven't been in
Arkham in years.
HARLEY
No, I'm there now, sleeping
off a double dose of tranq
darts.
IVY
OK - Harley. That sounds
like the dream. Just try to
see the reality of the
situation.
HARLEY
I'm looking around and I'm
not seeing any reality.
IVY
Oh, God, Harley, just -
take your meds, OK?
HARLEY
No, Joan said to wait.
IVY
Harley - Trust me, Joan
would want you to take
your meds.
HARLEY
No, she said 24 hours.
IVY
Harley - Fine! You know
what? I will call Joan
right now.
Ivy gets her phone from the night stand and after a moment of typing puts it to her ear.
IVY (CONT'D)
(sounding professional)
Hello, this is Dr. Pamela
Isley. I need to speak with
Director Leland. It is an
urgent matter concerning a
former patient of hers.
34.
Harley holds her finger and thumb up to her face and mocks Ivy's professional manner. Ivy looks at her, annoyed.
IVY (CONT'D)
No, I will not hold and
neither will her patient;
this is a potentially
critical situation that
will not wait! (beat) Dr.
Leland, this is Ivy.
Harley leans toward the phone.
HARLEY
Hi, Joan!
IVY
Yes, Joan, it's Pamela.
I'm calling about Harleen.
She's refusing to take her
meds because she had a
dream where you told her
not to.
After a moment Ivy holds the phone out for Harley.
IVY (CONT'D)
She wants to talk to you.
Harley takes the phone.
HARLEY
Hi, Joan!
JOAN (O.S.)
Harleen, tell me what is
happening.
HARLEY
Well, I'm having this dream.
The first part was really
healing, with Commissioner
Gordon in a cage to
represent my emotional
entrapment. And then there
was this little female bat-
person, which I think
represents the ideal of my
younger self. You know, my
superego.
IVY
You mean Batgirl? Batgirl
is your superego?
35.
HARLEY
(overlapping Ivy)
And then my superego and I
worked together to defeat
my ex, and I'm not even
gonna get started on all
the things he represents,
but before we could uncage
Gordon and get the emotional
release Batman came out of
nowhere and clocked me in
the head with a batarang!
JOAN (O.S.)
Alright, it sounds like
Batman represents your
frustration.
HARLEY
No argument here, sister.
But then the dream moved
here, and I'm having trouble
decoding that, because I
mean...
She turns away and cups her hand over the phone.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
(softly)
I mean, am I developing a
latent attraction for women
with green skin? 'Cause
that is a very specific
fetish.
JOAN (O.S.)
That could simply be a
longing for intimacy.
Harley looks back at Ivy, leaning against a pillow with her hands behind her head.
HARLEY
I don't know, doc, she's
looking pretty good.
Ivy smiles and winks.
JOAN (O.S.)
My main concern, however,
is why you are convinced
that you are dreaming now.
HARLEY
Because I'm still a cartoon.
36.
JOAN (O.S.)
Alright, Harleen, the first
thing that I'm going to ask
you to do is promise me that
you will not bash yourself
in the head in the hopes of
seeing tweety birds.
Harley scoffs.
HARLEY
Geez, what do you people
think of me, I'm not going
to bash myself in the head!
JOAN (O.S.)
And next I'm going to ask
you to take your medication.
HARLEY
But you told me not to! The
real you, I mean.
There is a pause.
JOAN (O.S.)
OK. The real me told you not
to take real medication but
the dream me is telling you
to take your dream
medication. That should
take you back to reality.
HARLEY
So, it's like - reality
medication.
JOAN (O.S.)
Yes.
HARLEY
OK, thanks, Joan!
She hangs up and tosses the phone on the bed.
IVY
So... I hear you have a
very specific fetish.
Harley chuckles.
HARLEY
Well... it is just a dream,
right?
IVY
That's the spirit.
37.
Harley jumps into bed laughing.
INT. ARKHAM - INFIRMARY - NIGHT
Harley is asleep on a hospital bed, old-fashioned restraints on her wrists and ankles. There are bruises on her face and arms. She begins to moan with pleasure. A slight smile plays across her face and she giggles. She opens her eyes.
Edith is standing at the foot of her bed, Joan is sitting nearby holding an icepack to her left eye.
HARLEY
What's up, docs?
JOAN
Your actions incited a riot.
You were trampled.
Harley moves a little and grunts in pain.
HARLEY
Trampling is my least
favorite form of beating. At
least I was unconscious for
it! (beat) Oh, Joan, did you
get trampled too?
JOAN
Not exactly.
EDITH
She was knocked against the
wall while we were trying to
drag you to safety.
HARLEY
Oh, Joan, you took a shiner
for me? You're too good to
me.
JOAN
It's a miracle you don't
have any broken bones but
I still want you to stay
here overnight.
HARLEY
I'm tougher than I look.
And I look pretty tough.
Harley smacks her lips like she's tasting her own tongue.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
Is this morphine? So much
for 24 hours without meds,
huh? (laughs)
(MORE)
38.
HARLEY
Oh, and you were wrong about
the reality medication;
turns out I just had to get
laid!
Before a confused Joan can ask about that the DOOR SLAMS OPEN and Cash storms in.
CASH
It's like a full moon out
there! What the hell were
you thinking, Quinn?
HARLEY
Hey, if you won't muzzle
your dogs I'll do it for
you!
Cash takes in a deep breath in preparation for a shouting match that Harley looks only too eager to join in. Edith RUSHES BETWEEN THEM, her palms facing both.
EDITH
Wait! It doesn't have to
be like this.
She looks up as if trying to think of something to say. She shakes her head slightly at first but then looks at Harley. She takes Harley's right hand and looks her in the eye.
EDITH (CONT'D)
I don't want you to do
anything like that again.
I know you meant well but...
She looks down for a moment then back into her eyes.
EDITH (CONT'D)
I've looked like this my
whole life. You don't think
I've been called worse?
They're just words, Harley.
Edith gives Harley's hand one last squeeze and steps back.
EDITH (CONT'D)
I want you to get some rest
and I will see you tomorrow.
HARLEY
Sure thing, Doc Laffs.
Edith opens her mouth like she wants to say something else but just smiles and nods. She walks out of the room, past empty beds and a vacant desk with a LAMP on it.
39.
CASH
Well, there are still some
'words' I'd like to say but
I guess I'll just get back
to work.
He leaves. Joan stands, letting down the icepack to show that she does, indeed, have a shiner.
JOAN
Harleen, when you first
came here as a patient, I
didn't know what to do. I
remember thinking that the
only person that could have
reached 'Harley Quinn' was
Dr. Quinzel and she was no
longer available. But with
Dr. Lafferty's help I have
real hope that we might get
her back. What do you think?
Harley opens her mouth but for once is speechless.
JOAN (CONT'D)
Just try. Not for me, for
yourself.
She walks out of the room. Harley watches her go. She takes in a few quick, shallow breaths. Is she going to cry? ACHOO! Oh.
HARLEY
Oh, no, now my nose itches!
She tries to rub her nose on her shoulder but can't quite reach it. She scrunches her face, wiggling her nose like a bunny. She tries the other shoulder, growling in frustration.
She YANKS her right hand out of the restraint and rubs her nose, sighing in relief. She then looks at her hand in shock and SHOVES it back into the restraint. She looks at us, BREAKING THE FOURTH WALL.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
My wrist must have been
swollen when they cuffed me!
She looks up at the surveillance camera.
HARLEY (V.O.)
If they saw that they'll
radio Cash and he'll be
back here right about - now!
She looks at the door. It remains closed.
40.
HARLEY (V.O.)
He did say he was busy,
so maybe - now!
The door remains closed. She looks back at the camera.
HARLEY (V.O.)
They didn't notice!
She looks at us again.
HARLEY (V.O.)
This, kids, is what is
known as a CONUNDRUM.
SUPER: CONUNDRUM appears at the bottom of the screen.
HARLEY (V.O.)
On the one hand, Joan and
Doc Laffs are really trying
to help me and I don't want
to let them down. On the
other hand -
She slips her hand out of the restraint, holds it palm up, then slips it back.
HARLEY (V.O.)
This is not the kind of
opportunity a person gets
everyday. And bustin' out
of Arkham in less than 24
hours! Phew! That would
even beat Eddie's record.
She tries to fight down a laugh but it's no use.
HARLEY
He is going to be so pissed!
She slips her hand out of the restraint, frees her other hand, and then on to the ankles, laughing the whole time.
HARLEY (V.O.)
Sorry, Joan, but you were
right. I can't help myself.
If it's funny, I gotta do
it.
She bounces across the other beds to the desk with the lamp. She unplugs it and wraps the cord around her hand.
HARLEY (V.O.)
And the look on Eddie's
face when he finds out I
broke his record...
41.
Holding the lamp tightly with her other hand she RIPS OUT the CORD and looks at us again.
HARLEY
Priceless!
Harley unravels the cord and takes both ends. She wraps the ends around her hand a couple of times so she has a loop. In the other hand she takes the lamp by the light side so that she can swing the heavy base. Smiling, she walks to the door.
INT. HALLWAY TO INFIRMARY
A guard stands outside the door to the infirmary. Behind him the door opens and his head lurches forward with a BONK. He collapses as Harley steps out, her loop ready to take out another guard. She shrugs, disappointed.
HARLEY
One guard? You're getting
sloppy, Cash.
She chuckles as she takes off the guard's belt and wraps it around her own waist. She coils the cord and tucks it behind the buckle. She rolls her hair into a bun and traps it under the guard's cap, the bill turned backward at a slight angle.
HARLEY (V.O.)
Now, I'm out of my cell,
I got weapons, and unlike
those other numbskulls, I
ain't stickin' around for
petty vengeance. But there
is one staff member I'm
going to have to beat up
just one last time.
She goes to a surveillance camera in the corner and waves her hands over her head.
HARLEY
Hey, Cash! Cashie boy!
INT. SECURITY OFFICE
We see Harley on a monitor, waving her hands over her head, though we can't hear her shouting. ZOOM OUT to show a large bank of monitors, far larger than the one in the admissions office, all showing different scenes throughout the asylum.
Cash walks in holding a steaming hot cup of coffee. He closes the door behind himself and takes a sip as he looks at the monitors.
42.
The screen showing Harley, who is now waving middle fingers in front of herself so that they sometimes cross, is splashed with coffee and we hear Cash SPIT and SPLUTTER.
CASH
What the hell?
He looks back and forth between Harley and the empty bed he left her in just a few minutes ago. We see her laugh and run down the hall, turning and waving for us to follow her. He keys the mic on his shoulder.
CASH (CONT'D)
Security alert! Harley
Quinn has escaped the
infirmary!
He slams the cup down on the desk so hard it splashes on more monitors and his hand.
CASH (CONT'D)
Goddamnit!
He watches her closely.
CASH (CONT'D)
She's heading south - no,
now east - north? (beat)
She's heading down
stairwell B! Get her!
We now see, on the monitors, several guards readying weapons and moving toward the stairwell.
CASH (CONT'D)
Ha! She has nowhere to go!
We've already seen Harley take out three guards while chained, now she's loose and has a belt full of weapons. We hear 'COO COO' by JANIS JOPLIN as, on one monitor after another, she takes out pairs and trios of guards, laughing silently all the while.
Cash watches all this, his emotions ranging from shock to rage as he shouts orders into the mic. We don't hear his orders but we see his frustration grow.
Eventually Harley gets hold of a shotgun and looks the camera right in the eye with a wink and a smile. Cash ROARS and sweeps his hand across the desk, sending papers and what's left of his coffee crashing to the floor.
He leans forward on the desk, grinding his teeth as he studies the monitors.
43.
CASH (CONT'D)
Alright, everyone to the
Intensive Treatment
hallway! She has to go
through there!
We see a dozen guards, all well-armed by now, assemble in the hallway.
CASH (CONT'D)
Yes! We've got her- Wait!
She's taken an orderly
hostage!
We see the same heavy-set Orderly who brought Harley to her room. He was pushing an empty wheelchair but is now standing terrified against the wall. Harley is holding her shotgun under his chin. For those that can read lips, "Into the chair, fat boy."
CASH (CONT'D)
What's she doing? Oh no,
no, no!
(into radio)
Look out!
We see Harley round the corner to the Intensive Treatment hallway, RUNNING as fast as she can while PUSHING the Orderly in the WHEELCHAIR. Though we still can't hear them, Harley is LAUGHING and he is SCREAMING.
The guards try to scatter but she is veering all over the place and RUNS OVER a few FEET and KNOCKS several GUARDS TO the GROUND. When she reaches the end of the hall she gives the chair one last SHOVE INTO TWO of the three GUARDS there and HITS the THIRD WITH the butt of the SHOTGUN.
She then turns and UNLOADS the SHOTGUN, constantly moving and changing position. When it's empty she HURLS it like an axe at the only guard still standing. It flies into his face and bounces into one of the cameras through which we are watching the scene; the lens shatters.
She GRABS a PISTOL from the floor with a cartwheel. FOUR SHOTS with the pistol is all it takes before she is out of moving targets. She BLOWS a KISS at the camera before disappearing around the corner.
Cash's face is a mask of pure rage, his jaw clenched.
HARLEY (V.O.)
Right about now, Cash is
probably thinking...
Cash turns toward the door and looks up.
44.
Above the door is a large GLASS CASE containing a BAZOOKA. Written on the glass is 'BREAK IN CASE OF HARLEY QUINN'.
INT. STONE STAIRCASE
This stairwell is round, the steps going around in a spiral with a wide space in the center. Harley is skipping down the stone stairs, "Dah dah dah"ing the closing notes of 'Coo Coo'. She reaches the bottom and LOOKS AT US.
HARLEY
Ha! Just kiddin'! They don't
keep bazookas in hospitals,
not even these kinds of
hospitals. And in case you
didn't notice the lack of
blood back there, rubber
bullets and rock salt.
She shows us a raw spot on the back of her left arm where she caught some rock salt. She then puts her hand on her hip and cocks her head admonishingly.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
Which don't make it safe as
laser tag, so don't try this
at home, you little shits.
There is a noise above her and she turns quickly, her pistol raised. A guard is taking aim at her from the stairs. She shoots first. He is hit in the head, instantly unconscious, and spins and falls over the handrail, landing at her feet. Harley winces as she looks down at him then turns back to us, talking over her shoulder.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
See what I mean?
INT. ARKHAM - BASEMENT CORRIDOR
This is the oldest section of Arkham we have seen, a part of the original foundation. The black stone walls rise twenty feet before joining in an arch and solid stone beams run across a few feet below that. The sconce lights look like they were once gas but are now electric. This is a very wide corridor, nearly twenty feet, and there are hallways leading to it at either end.
Harley turns into the corridor from one hallway and looks toward the other. Beyond it is an alcove, where a pair of double doors are locked with a chain wrapped around the handles. The chain and the padlock which secures it are the only things that appear to be from this century.
45.
She grins and walks toward the doors. As she crosses the hallway she hears a CLICK and turns - and ducks just before the BANG! There are TWO MORE GUNSHOTS as she scrambles back to the corridor. We see SPARKS GLINT OFF THE STONE FLOOR.
Harley presses her back to the wall near the corner, the pistol in both hands.
HARLEY
Those weren't rubber.
We look beyond the corner to see Cash, his pistol in his right hand with his hook supporting it. He is still furious.
CASH
Harley Quinn! Lie face down
on the ground with your
hands behind your head!
Harley looks expectant.
HARLEY
Or...
CASH
(through gritted teeth)
Or I will blow your
goddamned head off.
Harley looks surprised.
HARLEY
Are you sure, Cash? You and
I both know, of all the
scars on your face, the one
under your left eye hurts
the worst.
Cash looks stunned.
INT. ADMISSIONS OFFICE - YEARS AGO
A slightly younger Cash, not as many scars and he still has his left hand, QUICK-DRAWS his PISTOL and FIRES TWICE.
BATMAN (O.C.)
NO!
We see only Batman's arms as he GRABS CASH BY the THROAT and SLAMS HIM AGAINST the WALL.
BATMAN (CONT'D)
I do not bring people to a
hospital for them to be
executed!
46.
Batman's right fist flies toward Cash's face; we cut away before it makes contact.
INT. BASEMENT CORRIDOR
Cash looks stunned. Harley peeks around the corner and SHOOTS the GUN OUT OF HIS HAND. BANG! CLICK. CLICK... CLICK.
HARLEY
Oh shit.
She throws the empty gun at him and turns to run.
SLO-MO: Cash CHARGES forward. The gun glances off his forehead with a splash of blood but he doesn't slow down.
REGULAR MOTION: Harley is RUNNING across the corridor with Cash in hot pursuit.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
Now, Cash, Cash, Cash
Cash Cash!
She turns as he catches up. He grabs her by the hips and slams her against the wall, her feet dangling two foot off the ground.
She hits him in the face with everything she has, left, right, left. He traps her left arm with his hook and, his right hand still on her hip, HURLS her nearly the whole way across the corridor.
Harley gets to her feet rubbing her left arm.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
Geez, Cash, you nearly broke
my arm! But you didn't!
Harley crosses her forearms, one vertical and one horizontal, in a classic 'shove it' pose. Cash CHARGES her again. This time she's ready and leaps to the side at the last second. She delivers a reverse round-house kick to his back so his head hits the wall.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
Toro!
She jumps back as he turns, narrowly avoiding a right hook. She continues to dodge as continues to punch; there is no doubt, from the ferocity of his swings, that even one landed blow would spell lights out for our little anti-heroine.
47.
She pulls a baton from her belt and tries to counter-attack but even when she scores a hit, in the same blood-splattered spot the gun hit him, it seems to make no difference. She's backing away, toward the alcove.
He grabs the baton with his right hand and hooks her arm with his left. He HURLS her again, away from the alcove. She lands in a heap but gets back to her feet... after a few tries.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
Wow... Cash, you... been
working out? You're...
looking good, buddy.
She tries to take a fighting stance but is a bit wobbly.
JOAN (O.C.)
Harleen!
Harley turns, shocked, to see Joan behind her, standing by the wall near the hallway. She looks back and forth between Joan and Cash.
HARLEY
Oh, come on, that's not
fair! Two against one?
CASH
Give it up, Quinn. You're
out of options.
Harley thinks a moment, biting her lip.
HARLEY
Well, I can think of one.
She takes the electric cord from behind her belt buckle and lashes out toward Joan.
SLO-MO: We see the plug end of the cord slowly uncoil.
HARLEY (V.O.)
I learned this from a former
patient of mine.
SLO-MO: The plug connects with Joan's temple. She instinctively jerks away from it, effectively bashing her own head into the wall. We see CARTOON TWEETY BIRDS fly around her head just before she falls backward.
SLO-MO: Harley turns toward Cash. He charges at her again. Harley, a smile starting on her face, whips the cord toward him.
48.
HARLEY (V.O.)
I actually learned this
move from the Bat.
SLO-MO: The cord wraps around Cash's neck. Harley yanks back hard. Cash's eyes widen as he is pulled forward - right into the flashlight/stun gun in Harley's left hand. We hear the CRACKLING OF ELECTRICITY. His momentum pushes her back a few steps and she is forced down into a crouch as he falls, her head bowed down.
And yes, by all means, take a bow, Harley Quinn! As she raises her smiling face we hear APPLAUSE. As she stands the applause gets louder and is accompanied by whistles and approving shouts. She bows left then right.
HARLEY
And if you're wondering why
I bothered with all this...
She bends down and takes the keyring from Cash's belt. LAUGHTER joins the applause as it dies down.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
Thanks, Cash. And it really
was good seeing you again.
She turns toward Joan's unconscious body as she skips backward toward the alcove.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
And Joanie, baby, you know I
love you, never change!
We again hear 'BASTARD'S BLUES' by BROTHER DEGE as she RUNS to the chained doors and finds the key that unlocks the padlock. The chain spills to the ground and she wrenches open the long sealed doors.
There is blackness beyond. She switches on the flashlight and walks inside, closing the door behind her.
INT. ARKHAM - DUNGEON
We see only what Harley illuminates with her flashlight, the rest of the chamber is pitch black. From the echoes of her footfalls, we get the impression that it is vast.
She maneuvers her way down a stone spiral stairway. She pans the light over the dusty floor and to the wall on her right. There are unlit torches in brackets.
49.
She walks for a while, occasionally looking to the right. There are rusty chains embedded in the wall, rustier manacles at the ends of those. She keeps walking.
After a while she sees something ahead. A table with metal straps for securing 'patients'. She pans to the wall to see a collection of grisly tools hanging there: spikes, hooks, saws.
She suddenly puts the light under her chin and grins at us.
HARLEY
By now you probably figured
out why this ain't a part
of the regular tour.
She giggles.
FEMALE VOICE (O.S)
(weakly)
Hello?
The mysterious voice echoes through the dungeon. The grin on Harley's face freezes as her eyes widen. All of her freezes except the hand holding the flashlight; it begins to tremble uncontrollably.
FEMALE VOICE (O.S.) (CONT'D)
Is anyone there?
Harley tries to work her mouth for a minute as she looks around wildly.
HARLEY
(high-pitched)
Nope.
FEMALE VOICE (O.S.)
Please...
Harley aims the light, still trembling, toward the source of the voice; there are two doorways by the tools on the wall, each a rectangle of blackness.
FEMALE VOICE (O.S.) (CONT'D)
Help us.
Harley points the light at the door on the left.
HARLEY
I'm not an exorcist or
nothin'...
She forces herself to take a step forward as she swallows.
50.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
But I know a guy.
She forces another step, and another. She walks like ice is flowing through her veins. She turns to us as she walks.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
(hissing)
What? They said please.
INT. DUNGEON - LAB
Here we are able to see Harley with a wan light. She sees a reflection of glass ahead and moves a little faster. She pans the light to the right - and JUMPS when she sees her own reflection. She immediately realizes her mistake and feels foolish.
HARLEY
HOLY - cheese and crackers.
She looks at her reflection in the glass wall and winks at herself. POISON IVY, not looking at all like herself with her usually green skin the brownish orange of an Autumn leaf and her once lustrous red hair hanging limply, appears inside Harley's reflection as she presses herself into the glass from the other side.
IVY
Harley?
HARLEY SCREAMS and jumps back - to hit another glass wall.
VICTOR (O.S.)
Harley Quinn.
Harley turns to see VICTOR FRIES, his bald blue head and ice-blue eyes. SHE SCREAMS LOUDER and jumps back again, hitting Ivy's wall. Off screen we hear MANBAT SCREECH.
Harley shines her light toward the sound to see MANBAT, his fangs glistening in the light. SHE SCREAMS AS LOUD AS SHE CAN, the light pointing at herself as she falls backward.
FADE TO WHITE. The scream fades into a high-pitched buzz.
We begin to hear voices, softly at first.
IVY (O.S.)
Harley? Harley!
VICTOR (O.S.)
Dr. Quinzel! We need your
help!
51.
IVY (O.S.)
Harley, it's us! Wake up!
Wake up, Harley!
The whiteness fades enough for us to see Harley, lying flat on the floor, the flashlight in her hand is on her chest and pointing at her face. Her eyes are wide open but only after Victor and Ivy make a few more pleas do we get the impression that anyone is home. She blinks and looks up.
She shines the light between them a few times.
HARLEY
Victor?
VICTOR
Yes, Dr. Quinzel. Victor
Fries.
She shines the light on Ivy. After a pause she gasps.
HARLEY
Ivy?
Harley gets to her feet and looks over Ivy.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
They can't keep you down
here! You need sunlight!
The chlorophyll in your
skin-
IVY
He turns on the grow
lights a couple of hours
a day. Just enough to
keep me alive.
VICTOR
It is the same with my
refrigeration. It is
barely cold enough to
keep the ice from melting.
Harley shines the light into his glass cell to see ice on the walls; it looks wet, like it could melt any second. Victor looks miserable. Manbat screeches and she shines the light on him.
HARLEY
Belfry!
She RUNS to his cell. Though it is the same size of the other two, it looks much smaller in proportion to his body.
52.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
You can't even stretch
your wings in there!
VICTOR
That is Dr. Langstrom.
HARLEY
I know Kirk! I used to
treat him when he could
still turn human sometimes.
We came up with the
nickname Belfry together.
She presses her hand to the glass and he presses his clawed hand to the other side, dwarfing hers. Harley turns toward the other two, who we can now see in the same wan light.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
(angry)
Who? Who's doing this?
IVY
Strange.
VICTOR
Dr. Hugo Strange.
We ZOOM IN on Harley's angry face.
HARLEY
You mean that guy's real?
FADE OUT:
There are many secrets inside the walls of Arkham Asylum. One of the most shocking is also the most recent - Dr. Edith Lafferty is not what she appears. Edith Lafferty is not even her real name.
FADE IN:
EXT. ARKHAM ASYLUM - DAY
'ARKHAM', written in iron, swoops up from left to right. Beyond it, a clear blue sky and fluttering song birds, among them a small black bat. We PAN TO AND ZOOM IN on the asylum.
INT. ARKHAM - OFFICE HALLWAY - DAY
We focus on a black door. Embossed in gold is 'DIRECTOR' and below that 'DR. LELAND'. The door opens and Edith walks out, her smile even brighter than usual. In her hands is the FILE for Harley Quinn. She looks down at it eagerly.
JENNIFER (O.C.)
Good morning, Dr. Lafferty.
Edith looks up to see JENNIFER, a NURSE.
EDITH
Good morning, Jennifer.
Edith walks down the hallway. Charlie, Brian, and Barney are walking from the other way.
CHARLIE
Good morning, Dr. Lafferty.
EDITH
Good morning, everyone.
Charles.
Charlie and Edith's eye contact lingers a moment as they pass each other. Once they're past each other, the ribbing begins.
BRIAN
(softly)
Oh, Charles.
BARNEY
(softly)
Are you going to want some
whipped cream with that
Strawberry Shortcake?
Brian snickers. Edith, not quite out of earshot, smirks.
CHARLIE
Oh, shut up, you guys.
You sound like you're
in high school.
2.
Edith giggles and walks on to her office, 'DR. LAFFERTY' painted in black on the smoked glass of the door.
INT. EDITH'S OFFICE - DAY
This office is relatively small. There are two filing cabinets, one with a RADIO on top, and an analog clock on the wall which shows it to be a little after nine. Behind the desk is a window with open horizontal blinds.
Edith sets the file down on the desk as she sits. She pushes her glasses to the top of her head; like a switch, the smile drops at the same moment. She looks at the SURVEILLANCE CAMERA in the corner as she sits back in the chair.
EDITH
You were right. She gave
me Quinn.
BATMAN (O.S.)
I knew she would.
INT. BATCAVE
We see Edith, through the camera, on a screen. ZOOM OUT SLOWLY to eventually show Harley's cell to the right, she's practicing handstands, and Joan's office to the left, she's already asleep in her chair.
BATMAN (O.C.)
I modeled the Lafferty alias
from Quinzel's profile. I'm
sure Leland sees the
similarities.
Edith nods thoughtfully.
EDITH
Maybe she's hoping Harley
will see it too. Remind her
how she used to be.
BATMAN (O.C.)
Hmm. Well, Harley Quinn's
mental health is not my
primary concern.
The corner of Edith's mouth twists up into a wry smirk.
EDITH
And what is your primary
concern?
BATMAN (O.C.)
The last time she escaped...
3.
INT. EDITH'S OFFICE
BATMAN (O.S.)
I never figured out how she
did it. Harley Quinn knows
a way out of Arkham Asylum
that I don't. And that is
unacceptable.
Edith nods as he speaks then chuckles.
EDITH
Well, I'll find out what I
can. In the meantime, I
have some homework to do.
She opens the file and begins reading.
INT. ELEVATOR
The green painted steel walls show a few signs of rust at the riveted seams and it shimmies a bit as it moves. Edith, holding the file, lowers her glasses and looks at the camera in the corner.
EDITH
Any last word of advice?
The elevator DINGS and the DOORS OPEN. We see the Intensive Treatment hallway, the same green as the elevator with tile along the lower five feet of the walls, above that cinder block and concrete painted a different shade. Dave, holding a shotgun, is standing guard before one of the doors.
INT. INTENSIVE TREATMENT HALLWAY
Edith pushes up her glasses, the smile returning like a switch, and walks toward Dave.
BATMAN (O.S.)
Quinn's not as crazy as she
pretends to be. Which isn't
to say that she's sane.
(beat) Case in point, she's
currently putting on a split-
personality show for the
guard.
Edith almost chuckles but covers it by talking to Dave, who stands before a green metal door with the number '17' stenciled in white. Below that, stenciled in black, is 'DR. LAFFERTY' and 'Patient Therapy in Session' and 'DO NOT DISTURB'.
4.
EDITH
Hello, David.
DAVE
Dr. Lafferty.
He shoulders the shotgun and slides back the bolt on the door, opening it for her. Harley is sitting handcuffed to a chair, she looks up as the door opens. Charlie stands behind her, his mouth slightly agape. We've seen this scene before but this time we remain in the hall.
EDITH
Thank you, David.
(to Harley) Hello!
(to Charlie) You can wait
outside the door, Charles.
Harley turns to him and looks up.
HARLEY
Yeah, good talk, Chuck.
Edith walks in as Charlie edges out, never taking his eyes off Harley.
CHARLIE
Alright, Dr. Lafferty,
just... be careful.
Edith sits opposite Harley at the table in the center of the room. She turns to Charlie with a flirty smile.
EDITH
I'll be fine.
Charlie leaves the room and closes the door, sliding the bolt to lock it. He looks at Dave and shakes his head.
CHARLIE
I've worked here a year, and
that is probably one of the
craziest people I've ever met
in my life.
Dave chuckles.
INT. BATCAVE
We see two images on the screen, both of Treatment Room 17, with one angled on Harley and the other on Edith.
5.
HARLEY
He always knew the real
reason I was so good at
talking to monsters.
(beat) The Joker didn't
make Harley Quinn. He
just let her out.
BATMAN (O.C.)
Could there have been a
split in her personality
before the Joker?
EDITH
Thank you, Harley. I
think that is enough for
today.
INT. INTENSIVE TREATMENT HALLWAY
There is a KNOCK and Charlie opens the door. Edith walks out and he closes it again.
EDITH
Thank you, Charles. You
can take her back to her
room now.
CHARLIE
Actually, we'll have to
call another guard. Chief
says we need three guards
minimum to move her.
EDITH
I trust Mr. Cash's
judgment, of course.
She looks at her watch.
EDITH (CONT'D)
In that case, it may be
best to take her to lunch
before returning her to
her room.
She begins to walk away.
CHARLIE
Uh, Dr. Lafferty?
She turns.
EDITH
Yes, Charles?
He starts to say something - then says something else.
CHARLIE
Have a nice day.
6.
She smiles.
EDITH
You too.
Edith walks away. Dave gives him a 'Come on, man!' look and Charlie gives him a 'Shut up' look before keying the mic at his right shoulder.
CHARLIE
Brian, report to Treatment
Room 17.
DAVE
Hey, I'm due for break.
CHARLIE
Right. (into radio) Barney,
you too, Treatment Room 17.
BRIAN (O.S.)
Copy.
BARNEY (O.S.)
Copy, on my way.
INT. FILE ROOM
Edith stands at one of the many filing cabinets of various ages that crowd the dusty room. Her glasses are pushed to the top of her head and she is speed-reading through a file laid out on an open drawer. She finishes.
BATMAN (O.S.)
Find anything?
She looks up at the camera in the corner, clearly annoyed. She closes the file and puts it back in the drawer before SLAMMING it shut.
EDITH
There's nothing here I don't
already know. For all anyone
knew, Harleen Quinzel was
exactly the same kind of
goody two shoes that Edith
Lafferty pretends to be.
BATMAN (O.S.)
Maybe she was pretending
too. Or is pretending now.
Edith drums her fingers on the top of the cabinet.
7.
EDITH
She didn't seem to be lying.
What did the detectors say?
BATMAN (O.S.)
They read her statements as
true, but she's beaten them
before; she knows exactly
how they work.
Edith scowls and looks around the room like she might see an idea somewhere.
BATMAN (O.S.) (CONT'D)
When the paper trail goes
cold, talk to people. They
know things that were never
written down.
EDITH
Leland. She knew Harleen
better than anyone else
available.
She picks up Harley's file and walks to the door.
BATMAN (O.S.)
Glasses.
She looks up at the camera, drops the glasses to her nose with a nod of her head, and shines her brightest Edith Lafferty smile. The smile fades quickly to a smirk and she walks out the door.
INT. CAFETERIA - DAY
Harley sidesteps into frame holding a plastic tray. Her hands are cuffed but no chain leads to her ankles at the moment and the chain between her wrists is long enough to facilitate eating. She is grinning.
HARLEY
Hiya, Doris! How ya been?
DORIS, standing behind the counter in an apron and hairnet, is a no-nonsense, heavyset woman who looks like she's seen it all and will no longer put up with it. She looks up at Harley and turns pale, her eyes widening.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
Could I have some mashed
potatoes, please?
Doris swallows and scoops some mashed potatoes onto a plate.
8.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
A little more.
Doris doubles the amount of mashed potatoes.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
And some vegetable medley.
Doris obeys and hands her the plate.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
Thanks, Doris!
Harley walks, carrying the tray, through the cafeteria. Charlie, Brian, and Barney stay near but not too close at all times. Harley is grinning at everybody.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
Hi, guys! Long time, no see!
Every face she greets looks back with either hate or fear and silence follows her as people stop talking amongst themselves to stare at her. She seems oblivious to this as she moves happily to her seat at an empty table.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
Isn't this great? Home
cooked meal. Friendly faces.
She looks around at the psychopaths who snarl back at her, most notably Two-Face, Penguin, and Lynns.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
Sometimes you just have to
go home again, know what I
mean, Chuck?
She turns to see him, all three guards stand behind her. Charlie shakes his head slightly but doesn't answer. She takes a forkful of mashed potatoes and dips it in the vegetable medley.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
So, Chuck. You and Doc
Laffs, huh?
She gives him a bawdy wink and puts the fork in her mouth.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
Oh, come on! I saw the
little sparklies in your
eyes when she looked at you.
She takes another bite and giggles when he starts to look uncomfortable.
9.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
Bet you haven't even asked
her out yet, have you?
Harley takes another bite and turns the other way to look at the other two guards, neither of whom are doing a very good job at hiding smirks.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
Has he?
She looks back and forth between them until Barney shakes his head, trying to stifle a chuckle.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
Ha! Knew it!
She continues to eat while Charlie stares angrily at Barney.
INT. ELEVATOR
Joan and Edith walk into the elevator and turn toward the doors as they close. Edith lowers her glasses and looks at the camera as Joan hits the button. The elevator rattles downward.
BATMAN (O.S.)
I knew it was Two-Face that
gave her the scar. But no,
I didn't know the whole
story.
The elevator DINGS and the DOORS OPEN.
INT. MAIN HALLWAY - DAY
This wide corridor is of nearly identical design to the Basement Corridor though of lighter color stone: the grey stone walls rise twenty feet before meeting in an arch and solid stone beams run across a few feet below that. The principle difference is that between the cross-beams the arches flatten out into gridded sky-lights.
Joan and Edith walk out of the elevator and toward the cafeteria as Edith pushes up her glasses.
BATMAN (O.S.)
That's why it's so important
to have an agent inside. Too
much of what happens in
Arkham goes undocumented.
10.
JOAN
And there she is.
Edith looks ahead to see Harley. Harley sees them at the same time and smiles, waving as well as she can while tethered. Edith smiles and waves back. Joan smiles stiffly and inclines her head, when she speaks her lips hardly move.
JOAN (CONT'D)
Don't kid yourself. That's
the same smile she'll use
when she holds a knife to
your throat.
Edith turns toward her, surprised. Joan looks back and shakes her head sadly. They hear a SCUFFLE and a GRUNT. They look toward Harley and begin running.
JOAN (CONT'D)
Harleen, Harleen, stop!
EDITH
(overlapping)
No, no, Harley, don't don't!
By the time they get there Harley has Brian's neck pinned with the chain between her wrists. She wrenches his head around so he's looking at Edith. Charlie, lying on the floor, is trying to line up a shot with his tranquilizer gun but it's hard to get a shot without hitting Brian.
HARLEY
Her name is DOC LAFFS! And
you will treat her with
respect! Or you will answer
to me!
She LEANS FORWARD at the last line, just enough to expose her face a little. Charlie takes careful aim and SHOOTS a DART INTO HER NECK. She looks up, exposing her chest.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
Huh?
He FIRES another DART INTO HER CHEST and she looks down at it with surprise.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
Oh.
She keels over, dragging Brian to the floor with her. Everyone sighs with relief. Until -
INMATE #1
Guard down!
11.
This comment is repeated a few times by different inmates until it is drowned out by the DIN OF every inmate SHOUTING at once and the STAMPEDE of their running feet. Joan's eyes widen in fear.
JOAN
(commanding)
On your feet! On your feet!
Charlie jumps up and untangles Brian from Harley's chains. Barney is down for the count. Joan looks toward the cafeteria to see the two guards at the double doors be over-run and stripped of weapons. SEVERAL INMATES are CHARGING toward them. She looks down at Harley and gasps.
JOAN (CONT'D)
Help me! We have to move her!
She bends down to get Harley's legs as Edith gets her shoulders. First Edith and then Joan are knocked against the wall by the torrent of orange clad legs. Joan is knocked unconscious while Edith is just dazed. She shakes her head in an effort to clear it. There is a GUNSHOT.
BATMAN (O.S.)
This needs to be contained
NOW!
Edith's eyes clear instantly. She gets into a crouch, her back to the wall, and reaches under her dress to her waist. She SCATTERS two handfuls of SMALL GREY BEADS which clatter along the floor before BURSTING INTO a THICK GREY FOG.
Just before the fog envelops Edith we see her whip off her glasses, a look of grim determination on her face. Scant seconds later a BAT-SHAPED PITON shoots out of the fog with the POP of an air-gun.
The piton lodges into the cross-beam overhead, a micro-filament rope trailing down from it.
BATGIRL emerges from the fog, ascending rapidly as the rope is reeled into her GRAPPLE GUN. The eyes of the mask are covered with RED LENSES. She ascends nearly all the way to the beam before swinging back and descending just as rapidly.
Though the fog hides everything below waist level, we can see that TWO INMATES HOLD CHARLIE'S ARMS while a THIRD IS PUMMELING HIM with fists. Batgirl hits the brakes on her gun and swings forward, kicking one of the inmates in the face with both D-heeled boots. He disappears into the fog as he falls back.
12.
Still in the air and holding the grapple gun with her left hand, she stands on one inmate's shoulders and delivers a stomp kick to the other's nose. Charlie breaks free and punches him out.
INMATE #2
It's the Bat!
Batgirl sees the inmate who spoke has a PISTOL AIMED AT HER.
Still standing on the shoulders of the inmate, Batgirl DESCENDS quickly just as the gun fires and then ASCENDS quickly with a BATARANG in her right hand. She throws it, knocking the gun from the shooter's hand. Charlie tackles him.
BATGIRL'S POV: As the inmate staggers beneath our feet, we see, in infrared, that one figure is curled into a ball on the floor while three others kick and stomp it.
OBJECTIVE POV: Batgirl jumps off the head of the inmate whose shoulders she's been standing on, kicking down hard with both feet and knocking him out, and swings toward the three inmates stomping the floor.
She kicks one off his feet before descending enough to land on her own. One of the inmates is terrified of her and backs away but the other kicks at her. Dropping her grapple gun, it is connected to her belt via a spring-loaded reel and returns to her waist, she blocks the kick and punches him twice, first in the solar plexus and then in the throat.
She and the inmate both disappear into the fog, him choking and clutching his throat. She rises back up with Brian, his nose bleeding. She pushes his pistol into his chest.
BATGIRL
(distorted voice)
On your feet!
Behind her, the inmate she had kicked off his feet raises his cuffed hands, ready to strangle her with the chain.
BATMAN (O.S.)
Behind you!
There is a GUNSHOT and the inmate behind her falls. Batgirl turns to see Charlie with his pistol still smoking. The fight has dissipated the fog in her area, it is only about knee level, and he can see her very clearly.
Charlie is shocked, then more shocked when she throws a batarang, seemingly right at him.
13.
It whistles by his left ear and he turns to see it strike the head of an inmate who'd been charging him. He turns back but she's gone.
We hear GUNSHOTS and Charlie turns again to see more guards enter the hallway with shotguns. He takes an aggressive stance with his pistol raised.
CHARLIE
Alright, on your knees,
hands behind your head!
On your knees!
One inmate tries to RUN and Charlie SHOOTS him in the head.
CHARLIE (CONT'D)
Alright, that guy can
lay down, the rest of
you on your knees!
Behind him, Brian, his nose still bleeding, points his pistol around as well.
BRIAN
On your knees! Hands
behind your head!
The inmates sullenly do as ordered.
EDITH (O.C.)
Charles? What's happening?
Edith emerges from a suspiciously fresh bank of fog; everywhere else it is dissipating. She is adjusting her glasses as she stands and her hair is in disarray.
CHARLIE
Are you alright, Dr.
Lafferty?
INMATE #3
(angrily)
Her name is DOC LAFFS!
There is an angry murmur of agreement from several other inmates. Edith and Charlie exchange questioning looks. Edith looks down at Harley, unconscious and already showing bruises from the trampling she just underwent, as the fog around her fades away.
EDITH
Oh, Harley, what have you
done?
14.
INT. INFIRMARY - DAY
Harley lies in one bed with restraints on her wrists and ankles, Joan lies in another with an icepack resting on her left eye. Between them, Edith sits in a chair, facing them so she can talk to whichever wakes up first. It's Joan, and Edith turns off the phone from which she'd been reading.
EDITH
Dr. Leland? Are you alright?
Joan takes the icepack from her eye and feels her head, grunting with pain.
EDITH (CONT'D)
You hit your head pretty
hard, but there's no sigh
of concussion.
Joan looks around with surprise. She has a black eye.
JOAN
What are we doing here? I
haven't been in this room
in years.
EDITH
I thought it best not to
keep Harley in the main
infirmary. She's not very
popular, is she?
Joan looks over at Harley in the next bed and snorts derisively.
JOAN
That's an understatement.
(beat) What's going on?
The riot?
EDITH
Deputy Chief Bolton came in
an hour ago to report that
all the patients are
secured in their cells.
Joan looks at her sharply.
JOAN
Edith. When they're in
your office, they're
patients. Out there, they're
inmates. The sooner you
realize that, the safer
you'll be.
Edith nods sadly.
15.
EDITH
I understand, Dr. Leland.
(beat) I wanted to wait
till you were awake, but
there's one inmate I need
to talk to. Regarding a
patient.
She looks at Harley. Joan purses her lips disapprovingly at first but eventually nods.
JOAN
Alright. Just be careful.
When they're riled up like
this, there's no telling
what could happen.
Edith nods and stands, putting the phone in the pocket of her lab coat as she walks to the door.
EDITH
I'll be careful. And I'll
try to be back before she
wakes up.
INT. ELEVATOR
Edith walks in and faces the doors as they close. She lowers her glasses but doesn't look at the camera.
EDITH
Where's Two-Face?
BATMAN (O.S.)
Why?
EDITH
I keep thinking about the
way Harleen dealt with him,
at Leland's party...
BATMAN (O.S.)
After all the trouble she
just caused you're still
thinking about her 'case'?
EDITH
An undercover job is still
a job. and besides...
She cuts her eyes at the camera and smirks.
EDITH (CONT'D)
I like a good mystery,
don't you?
Batman grunts, the closest he usually gets to a chuckle.
16.
BATMAN (O.S.)
Cell Block B. Cell 22.
Edith hits the button and the elevator rattles into motion.
INT. CELL BLOCK B - LOBBY/CORRIDORS
This cell block is identical to Cell Block A, with the high ceilings and the plaster-covered cinder block walls, except the letter 'B' is painted in bright orange on the wall of the lobby. Edith walks out of the elevator and smiles at the ORDERLY mopping the floor.
EDITH
Hi, I'm-
ORDERLY
Doc Laffs!
Edith opens her mouth in surprise but no sound comes out.
ORDERLY (CONT'D)
What can I do for you?
Edith closes her mouth and shakes her head. She smiles again.
EDITH
I'm looking for Cell 22.
ORDERLY
Two-Face? You would need two
guards to escort him, if you
want to take him somewhere.
EDITH
No, I just need to speak
with him.
ORDERLY
OK.
He sets his mop in the bucket and rolls it to the side, leaning it against the wall.
ORDERLY (CONT'D)
This way.
He walks down the corridor, Edith following. We begin to hear the rumble of several agitated voices. They pass cells through which we see several agitated inmates. One of them recognizes her, his eyes widening.
INMATE #4
Doc Laffs!
17.
A HUSH falls over the cell block, somehow more unsettling than the rumble of voices from before. As they walk, every inmate is staring at her. They finally reach Two-Face's cell. He stands at the glass door, flipping a coin and catching it in alternating hands with a practiced ease.
EDITH
Hello, I'm-
TWO-FACE:GOOD SIDE
Doc Laffs. We heard.
TWO-FACE:BAD SIDE
Seems clown-girl's taken a
shine to you.
Edith shakes her head resignedly and smiles at him. As she speaks to him she looks back and forth between his left and right eyes.
EDITH
As you may know, she is a
patient of mine. I
understand you used to be
hers?
TWO-FACE:BAD SIDE
Not at first.
TWO-FACE:GOOD SIDE
No, when we first met
Harleen, we were still the
DA.
INT. ARKHAM - OFFICE HALLWAY - YEARS AGO - DAY
We hear 'HELLO, HELLO' by ELTON JOHN being sung in duet with LADY GAGA. HARVEY DENT, Two-Face before the left side of his face was scarred by acid, is walking down the hall. He wears a tailored suit and is carrying a leather briefcase.
Harleen is walking toward him, reading from a file in her hand and not paying attention. He sees her and grins. He stops right in front of her. Though we don't hear him, he clears his throat just before she collides with him.
She looks up, startled. He laughs, then so does she, then she gapes. Of course she recognizes him, she probably voted for him. We hear only the song and Two-Face's voice over.
TWO-FACE:GOOD SIDE (V.O.)
We were handsome then.
Harvey smiles at Harleen and speaks to her.
18.
TWO-FACE:BAD SIDE (V.O.)
And she was so beautiful.
Harleen almost blushes at whatever Harvey said.
TWO-FACE:GOOD SIDE (V.O.)
In that shy way that tells
you she doesn't know she is.
INT. RESTAURANT - YEARS AGO - NIGHT
Harvey and Harleen are sitting at a linen-clothed table. She is wearing a slinky black dress and dangling black earrings, her blonde hair put up very stylishly. They are drinking champagne and looking into each other's eyes.
TWO-FACE:GOOD SIDE (V.O.)
It could have been so
wonderful.
Harvey sees someone beyond her and his eyes widen. GILDA, a woman in a red dress, is approaching them angrily.
TWO-FACE:BAD SIDE (V.O.)
But life is just a flip of
a coin.
Gilda SLAMS her hands down on the table. Harleen looks up at her, startled. Gilda begins to SHOUT, Harvey tries to speak.
TWO-FACE:GOOD SIDE (V.O.)
Maybe, being so handsome,
we overextended ourselves.
Harleen says something and Gilda grabs a glass of champagne from the table and SPLASHES it all over her dress. Harleen GASPS in shock.
TWO-FACE:BAD SIDE (V.O.)
Or maybe we just went to
the same restaurant too
many times.
Harleen grabs the plate of food in front of her and SMASHES it into Gilda's face. The two begin FIGHTING, WRESTLING, rolling over someone else's table. Harvey sinks in his chair, covering his face with his hand.
TWO-FACE:BAD SIDE (V.O.)
Not that we were ever
allowed there again.
CELL BLOCK B - CORRIDOR
Two-Face flips the coin and catches it again.
19.
EDITH
You don't look to see which
side it lands on?
He holds it up to show that it is blank.
TWO-FACE:GOOD SIDE
It's a blank. They wouldn't
let us have our real coin.
TWO-FACE:BAD SIDE
Doc Quinzel gave us this.
TWO-FACE:GOOD SIDE
She would let us see the
real one in therapy, though.
(beat) Until her supervisor
made her stop.
EDITH
Dr. Leland.
TWO-FACE:BAD SIDE
We got her back, though.
Two-Face grins evilly. Edith nods soberly.
EDITH
When did you start seeing
Dr. Quinzel?
TWO-FACE:GOOD SIDE
As soon as we were admitted.
TWO-FACE:BAD SIDE
She got all the tough cases.
After what she did for
Lynns, she was considered a
miracle worker.
EDITH
Lynns?
TWO-FACE:GOOD SIDE
Garfield Lynns.
TWO-FACE:BAD SIDE AND EDITH
(together)
Firefly.
Edith nods thoughtfully and smiles.
EDITH
Thank you. Both of you.
20.
She turns and walks back the way she came. Two-Face flips his coin again, catching it without looking.
TWO-FACE:BAD SIDE
Anytime, Doc Laffs.
TWO-FACE:GOOD SIDE
See, she's a good one.
TWO-FACE:BAD SIDE
Yeah, and you're a suck-up.
TWO-FACE:GOOD SIDE
Now, why would you even say
that?
TWO-FACE:BAD SIDE
'Cause you're a suck-up!
INT. ELEVATOR
Edith steps in as the doors close.
BATMAN (O.S.)
Cell Block C, cell 34.
Edith pushes the button and smirks as the elevator starts.
EDITH
Looks like I'm not the only
one who likes a mystery.
Batman almost chuckles that time.
INT. CELL BLOCK C - CORRIDOR
We see, through his cell door, Lynns doing push-ups on his fists, a towel on the floor beside him. Edith walks up and stops in front of the door.
EDITH
Hello. Garfield Lynns?
He stops doing push-ups but doesn't look up.
EDITH (CONT'D)
I'm... I'm Doc Laffs.
Lynns picks up the towel as he stands and wipes the sweat from his fire-scarred face before he looks at her. He leaves the towel draped over his shoulder as they look at each other in SILENCE.
21.
EDITH (CONT'D)
I'm Harley Quinn's doctor.
I understand she used to be
yours?
LYNNS
Dr. Quinzel was my doctor.
EDITH
You don't consider them to
be the same person?
He gives a derisive snort and shakes his head. There is more SILENCE.
EDITH (CONT'D)
Did you like Dr. Quinzel?
They say she was the only
doctor that ever really
reached you. (beat) I was
just wondering what she did
that was so different.
There is more SILENCE.
LYNNS
You know, I've told every
other doctor who's asked
me that to go to hell...
but if the clown vouches
for you...
INT. THERAPY ROOM 17 - YEARS AGO - DAY
Lynns, not yet scarred, sits handcuffed to the chair. The door opens and Harleen walks in, carrying a file.
HARLEEN
Thank you, Joseph.
She walks to the table as the door closes and smiles at Lynns.
HARLEEN (CONT'D)
Hello. I'm Dr. Quinzel.
Lynns scoffs as she sits. She opens the file and readies a pencil over a blank page.
HARLEEN (CONT'D)
You're Garfield Lynns,
right?
LYNNS
It's just Lynns. Or are you
like Leland and can only
call people by their proper
first name?
22.
HARLEEN
No, Lynns is fine.
She writes his name on the paper.
LYNNS
I'll tell you right now,
when I bust out of here,
I'm finding every piece of
paper with my name on it
and torching them.
Harleen looks at him, not surprised. She seems to consider for a moment.
HARLEEN
That seems fair.
Lynns is surprised.
LYNNS
What do you mean?
Harleen sets down the pencil and slides a small metal trash can nearer to him. She rips out the page she just wrote on and shows him that his name is written on it. She crumples it loosely and tosses it into the can.
Lynns is watching her, his eyebrows knitted. She pulls a matchbook from her pocket and lights a match, watching the way he stares at it in wonder. She drops it onto the paper.
We see the reflection of the flames in Lynns' eyes. He watches until the paper is shriveled into black and grey ash. He looks up at her in surprise.
HARLEEN
At the end of every session,
you can torch everything we
write. I'll even let you
light the match.
Lynns sits back, stunned.
LYNNS (V.O.)
Now, I'm no idiot, Doc.
I know there's cameras
and microphones. Burning
the paper didn't really
mean anything. But just
the thought that she'd
let me do it...
Lynns begins to talk, though we don't hear him
LYNNS (V.O.)
I opened up. I told her
everything.
23.
Harleen is writing, looking up at him ever occasionally. They both laugh at one point, though we still don't hear them.
LYNNS (V.O.)
And at the end of the
session...
Harleen glances at her watch and sets down the pencil.
HARLEEN
That was great, Lynns.
She sighs and turns the file to face him. She pushes it close enough for him to touch it, the whole file, now just the pages they'd written.
HARLEEN (CONT'D)
Care to do the honors?
Lynns looks at it. He flips through the pages as best he can with the handcuffs tethering him to the chair. He pushes it away.
LYNNS
Nah. File it. Maybe I'll
torch it when we're finished.
Harleen smiles and closes the file. She stands.
LYNNS (CONT'D)
Same time next week, doc?
HARLEEN
Of course.
INT. CELL BLOCK C - CORRIDOR
Lynns is looking off to the side, at the wall of his cell.
LYNNS
And when I did bust out,
I left the file. I kind of
liked the idea of it being
there, my life story, hand-
written by her.
He looks at Edith, who is staring at him with rapt attention.
LYNNS (CONT'D)
I'll tell you what else.
I stopped torching things
for fun after that. That's
when I turned professional.
I know that's a far cry
from (scoffs) 'cured, but...
24.
He pauses a moment. His eyes suddenly narrow in anger.
LYNNS (CONT'D)
And do you know what that
bitch - Harley Quinn - did?
INT. DIRECTOR'S OFFICE - YEARS AGO - NIGHT
We hear 'FIRE WOMAN' by THE CULT. Two-Face is swinging an already bent golf club into the desk, just the left side. In the chair behind the desk is the DIRECTOR, though the chair is turned away from us we can see the top of his bald head and his hands hanging lifelessly to the sides. Behind Two-Face there are green question marks spray painted on the wall.
LYNNS (V.O.)
First time she busted out
of here...
Harley, missing a hair tie (wonder where that is), prances in holding a cardboard box. She dumps the contents, files and papers, on the desk.
LYNNS (V.O.)
She took all the files
from when she was a doctor...
Harley lights a match, the reflection of the flame dancing in her grinning eyes, and tosses it into the pile.
LYNNS (V.O.)
And torched them.
The FIRE GROWS and Harley and Two-Face both howl in exhilaration, their hands in the air.
INT. CELL BLOCK C - CORRIDOR
Lynns is fuming with anger.
LYNNS
She didn't even let me
light the match.
He turns away and takes a few steps. He turns back to Edith.
LYNNS (CONT'D)
Everyone loved Dr. Quinzel.
And everyone hates Harley
Quinn. That different enough
for you, Doc?
252.
Edith is silent for a while. She shakes her head in confusion.
EDITH
Wait, you said the only
reason you'd talk to me is
because she vouched for me,
then you tell me how much
you hate her?
LYNNS
Hate her or not, she's a
good judge of character.
Except where the Joker's
concerned.
EDITH
The Joker... You probably
worked for him.
LYNNS
I don't work for anybody,
lady. I have clients. But,
yeah, the Joker was a
regular customer. He loved
watching things burn. Even
chemical plants.
Lynns rubs the scars on his face.
LYNNS (CONT'D)
Not that this is his fault.
It's the Bat's.
BATMAN (O.S.)
It was his own fault. I was
just trying to stop him.
EDITH
(softly)
I know.
Lynns looks at her, surprised. He looks her in the eye more carefully and nods.
LYNNS
Yeah. Good judge of
character.
Edith smiles, more like herself than Dr. Lafferty.
EDITH
Thanks, Lynns.
LYNNS
See you around, Doc Laffs.
He tosses the towel on his bed and begins punching the wall.
26.
INT. ELEVATOR
Edith walks in and pushes the glasses to the top of her head. She begins to pace around in the elevator, thinking.
BATMAN (O.S.)
Ironic that Lynns hates
Quinn for burning the files
when it was probably him
that gave her the idea.
Edith continues to pace.
BATMAN (O.S.) (CONT'D)
I'm guessing the irony is
not what's on your mind.
EDITH
That was a very bold form of
therapy for a pyromaniac.
BATMAN (O.S.)
Fortune favors the bold. It
worked.
Edith looks at the camera as she turns, still pacing.
EDITH
But she wasn't bold!
Sneaking in the matchbook
is one thing, but if anyone
saw that on the
surveillance cameras...
BATMAN (O.S.)
It's a poorly kept secret
that the cameras are just
a deterrence, they're
rarely monitored very
closely.
Edith stops pacing and just taps her foot with her arms crossed.
EDITH
Still, it was a big risk.
And that is not compatible
with the profile of Harleen
Quinzel that I read.
BATMAN (O.S.)
Nor is attacking a romantic
rival in a restaurant. Maybe
she was hiding a darker side
after all.
Edith hits a button and lowers her glasses back to her eyes.
27.
BATMAN (O.S.) (CONT'D)
Leland again?
EDITH
Leland again.
INT. INFIRMARY - NIGHT
Edith opens the door to discover Joan asleep in the chair, which has been moved to the foot of Harley's bed. Though she moves in quietly, Joan wakes up instantly. Edith grins.
EDITH
Do you always sleep sitting
up?
JOAN
Only when I'm at work.
Joan shakes her head and puts the icepack back to her eye.
JOAN (CONT'D)
I was having a dream where
I was talking with Harleen
on the phone. (beat) What
about you? Did you learn
anything useful regarding
your patient?
Edith looks at Harley and sighs.
EDITH
Every question led to more
questions.
JOAN
Maybe you just need to find
the right question. Or the
right person to ask. Who
did you talk to?
EDITH
I talked to some of her
former patients. Two-Face
and Lynns.
Joan chuckles.
JOAN
I can't imagine Garfield
Lynns was much help.
EDITH
No, he was. Is it true
that he was her first
big case? That after that
she got all the tough cases?
28.
JOAN
(shocked)
Garfield Lynns spoke with
you?
EDITH
Yes. He said I had good
character.
Joan laughs.
JOAN
Wow! You're even more like
her than I thought. To
answer your question, yes,
he was her first big case,
but no, she didn't get the
tough cases because of that.
She asked for them.
She shakes her head, chuckling.
JOAN (CONT'D)
She kept asking for them.
But she was so young I
didn't want to give them to
her. Finally, though, she
convinced me to give her
the Edward Nygma case.
Joan shakes her head again but is not chuckling.
JOAN (CONT'D)
(ruefully)
And that one almost broke
her.
INT. REC ROOM - YEARS AGO
A SHOTGUN held by a green-sleeved arm is thrust at Harleen's face, stopping within inches. She quakes in fear, trembling like a leaf in a hurricane.
INT. INFIRMARY - NIGHT
Joan lets out a heavy sigh.
JOAN
I made her take a week off
after that; it was so much
trauma for someone so
inexperienced. I remember
dreading every time the
phone rang, convinced it
would be her, calling to
resign.
She looks at Harley and smiles.
29.
JOAN (CONT'D)
But she came back, stronger
than ever. I offered to take
the Nygma case for her and
she refused. Said she had to
face him again.
INT. INTENSIVE TREATMENT HALLWAY - YEARS AGO
Harleen stands outside Treatment Room 17, which now reads 'DR. QUINZEL' instead of Lafferty. She takes a deep breath, steeling herself, then nods to JOSEPH, the guard standing in front of her. He opens the door and we see EDWARD NYGMA, AKA THE RIDDLER, sitting in the chair in a straight jacket.
JOAN (V.O.)
And she did.
He grins at her as she walks in. Joseph closes the door, slides back the bolt, and side-steps out of frame.
JOAN (V.O.)
And in the end...
There is a KNOCK and Joseph opens the door. Harleen walks out. Beyond her we can see Nygma, SOBBING.
JOAN (V.O.)
She broke him.
NYGMA
(pleading)
Please, Dr. Quinzel. Please.
Joseph closes the door and steps out of frame.
JOAN (V.O.)
After that, I didn't have
as much problem giving her
the tough cases. And there
were plenty of them.
Joseph opens the door to show Penguin. He scowls at Harleen as she walks in. Joseph closes the door and steps away.
There is a knock and Joseph opens the door. Harleen walks out. Behind her Penguin smiles at the bird perched on his finger. He then smiles at her.
PENGUIN
Thank you, Dr. Quinzel.
Truly.
Joseph closes the door, steps out of frame, then steps in and opens it to show Two-Face. Harleen walks in.
30.
TWO-FACE:GOOD SIDE
Harleen! Thank God!
Joseph closes the door, steps away. There is a knock and he opens it. Harleen walks out. Behind her Two-Face is flipping the blank coin and smiling.
TWO-FACE:BAD SIDE
Thanks, doc.
Joseph closes the door, steps away then back. He opens it to show Poison Ivy handcuffed to the chair. Harleen walks in holding a POTTED PLANT.
HARLEEN
I got you a present.
Joseph closes the door but doesn't step away. After a moment there is an odd sort of CLATTERING KNOCK and he looks suspicious. He opens the door to a scene of bedlam, VINES WHIPPING OUT at him, Harleen off her feet with a VINE AROUND HER NECK. Ivy is out of her handcuffs.
JOSEPH
Bring it in, bring it in!
SEVERAL GUARDS armed WITH HEDGE CLIPPERS and WEED KILLER spray RUSH IN. Joseph rushes in after them and pulls out Harleen, the vine still around her neck. He RIPS it off and she COUGHS, rubbing her throat.
HARLEEN
(hoarsely)
We'll try again next week!
INT. INFIRMARY
Edith looks shocked.
EDITH
She gave a live plant to
Poison Ivy?
Joan shakes her head and sighs.
JOAN
I didn't always approve and
she didn't always wait for
my approval, but Harleen
believed unorthodox patients
needed unorthodox treatment.
More often than not she was
proven right.
31.
Edith nods thoughtfully. Harley starts to stir.
HARLEY
(mumbling)
Oh, you're a naughty one.
She giggles as Joan and Edith suppress laughs.
INT. ADMISSIONS OFFICE - NIGHT
DEPUTY CHIEF LYLE BOLTON, as large as Cash but younger and more toned, is standing at ease, his hands behind his back and a stoic look frozen on his face. Cash is pacing back and forth in front of him.
CASH
(angrily)
If there is a riot, I want
to know about it!
Immediately! I don't care
if it's the middle of the
day; wake me up! Is that
clear, Bolton?
BOLTON
Understood, Chief.
Cash turns away, shaking his head. Bolton silently mouths every insult he wants to shout at him, then returns to stoic the second Cash turns back to him.
CASH
What started the riot
anyway?
INT. INFIRMARY
As Harley speaks we focus on Edith's reaction to Batman.
HARLEY (O.C.)
Is this morphine? So much
for 24 hours without meds,
huh? (laughs) Oh, and you
were wrong about the
reality medication; turns
out I just had to get laid!
BATMAN (O.S.)
(overlapping)
Cash is on the way. He's
furious. He and Quinn will
start arguing; I want you
to use the distraction to
loosen her restraint.
Edith is shocked. The DOOR SLAMS OPEN and she turns to see Cash storm in.
32.
CASH
It's like a full moon out
there! What the hell were
you thinking, Quinn?
HARLEY
Hey, if you won't muzzle
your dogs I'll do it for
you!
Edith RUSHES between them, her palms facing both.
EDITH
Wait! It doesn't have to
be like this.
Edith looks up as if trying to think of something to say.
INT. BATCAVE
We see Edith looking right at the camera. She shakes her head slightly.
BATMAN (O.C.)
Do it. I just want to see
which way she runs.
We see a very brief but resentful look in her eyes before she looks at Harley, back in character.
INT. INFIRMARY
Edith takes Harley's right hand and looks her in the eye.
EDITH
I don't want you to do
anything like that again.
I know you meant well but...
She looks down.
EDITH (V.O.)
Where is that strap?
She looks back into Harley's eyes; as she speaks we focus on the restraint. Edith loosens the strap a little.
EDITH
I've looked like this my
whole life, you don't think
I've been called worse?
They're just words, Harley.
33.
Edith gives Harley's hand one last squeeze and steps back.
EDITH (CONT'D)
I want you to get some rest,
and I will see you tomorrow.
HARLEY
Sure thing, Doc Laffs.
Edith opens her mouth but then just smiles and nods. She turns and walks out of the room.
INT. BATCAVE
We see, from the camera in the hall, Edith walking out of the room and down the hall. She lowers her glasses and looks at the camera, shaking her head.
INT. HALLWAY TO ELEVATOR
Edith is waiting for the elevator when she hears running feet behind her. She turns - and presses her back to the wall as THREE GUARDS RUSH PAST HER into the elevator. One guard looks at her as the doors close.
GUARD
Sorry, Doc Laffs, emergency!
Edith throws up her hands in disgust. She goes to the door to the right of the elevator, marked 'STAIRS', and SLAMS it open with one hand.
INT. EDITH'S OFFICE - NIGHT
The room is lit only with the desk lamp and the moonlight streaming through the horizontal blinds. The clock again shows that it is a little after nine. Edith sits with the chair turned away from the desk, her boots, one crossed over the other, rest on the windowsill. Her glasses are at the top of her head.
BATMAN (O.S.)
I guess you think I made a
mistake.
EDITH
Oh, permission to speak
candidly, sir? Yeah, that
was really stupid.
34.
INT. BATCAVE
We see the Intensive Treatment hallway, through several different cameras, on the screen. Harley is careening the wheelchair through the throng of guards there.
BATMAN (O.C.)
I'm not in a position to
argue.
Harley unloads her shotgun on the guards, throws it into the last one standing, and picks up the pistol from the floor. After her four shots fininsh off the last of the moving targets, she blows a kiss to the camera.
INT. EDITH'S OFFICE
BATMAN (O.S.)
I really thought this was
the best way to ensure the
least number of casualties.
She should have just slipped
off to her exit. Instead,
she purposefully called as
much attention to herself as
she could.
Edith breathes hotly out her nose. She shakes her head.
EDITH
What's she doing now?
INT. BATCAVE
We see Harley at the base of the stone staircase, talking to an empty hallway.
BATMAN (O.C.)
She's... talking to an
imaginary friend. She's
taken out nearly every
guard in the entire
building.
Harley turns suddenly, her pistol raised. She FIRES. A GUARD FALLS from the stairs and lands at her feet. She winces as she looks down at him and then turns back to her imaginary friend, talking again.
INT. EDITH'S OFFICE
BATMAN (O.S.)
And that one might have
been lethal.
Edith groans, her hand covering her eyes.
35.
BATMAN (O.S.) (CONT'D)
Cash is on his way to deal
with her personally.
EDITH
She told us. She told us,
people like her value
vengeance over freedom.
She feels her waist on the left side.
EDITH (CONT'D)
Speaking of stupid, I didn't
reload my grapple gun.
Edith stands and moves to the radio on top of the filing cabinet, her hand on the dial.
EDITH (CONT'D)
Hallway clear?
BATMAN (O.S.)
Yes.
She turns the dial to three specific stations, like turning a combination lock. We hear a CLICK and she opens the top drawer.
BATMAN (O.S.) (CONT'D)
You shouldn't beat yourself
up over not reloading. You
were getting back in
disguise.
Edith raises the left side of her dress and grabs the grapple gun. She sighs as she looks at it.
EDITH
No. An unloaded gun can be
more dangerous than a
loaded one.
She takes a RELOAD from the drawer, a reel and short rod with a piton at the end. She fits the piton into the end of the gun and pulls the reel back, snapping it into place behind the handle.
BATMAN (O.S.)
Your father taught you that.
She looks over the loaded gun.
EDITH
He was speaking from
experience.
36.
EXT. GOTHAM STREETS - YEARS AGO - NIGHT
COMMISSIONER JAMES GORDON, we'll just call him JIM, creeps forward, taking cover behind a car. He peeks over the hood. RED AND BLUE LIGHTS FLASH over the grim scene.
VICTOR ZSASZ, his back to Jim, is holding a WOMAN hostage, a knife to her throat. She is terrified and is bleeding from cuts on her arms and a slash across her cheek. In front of them are FOUR OFFICERS with guns pointed at him.
Jim stands and steps forward quickly, jamming his gun to the back of Zsasz's head.
JIM
Freeze, Zsasz!
Zsasz releases the hostage, who runs away. He drops the knife and laughs.
ZSASZ
Jim, is that you?
Two Officers step forward. One is a woman. Zsasz grabs her arm with his left hand and spins around, shoving her into Jim as he takes her gun with his right hand and elbow smashes the nose of the other Officer, who is stunned.
Jim side-steps the female Officer and pulls the trigger on Zsasz. CLICK. Both he and Zsasz look shocked. ZSASZ FIRES the gun THREE TIMES, TWO INTO the THROATS of Officers and the THIRD INTO a FIRE HYDRANT. He leaps through the resulting wall of water.
Jim reloads and curses as he moves toward the water.
JIM
No! Damnit!
Jim leaps through the water as he chambers a round. His gun is held ready - but there are no targets. The street is empty.
JIM (V.O.)
But I was too late. He got
away.
He looks back at the blue and red lit water shooting from the fire hydrant for a moment, then he looks down with a sigh, shaking his head in disappointment.
JIM (V.O.)
And I was alone on that
side of the water for a
long time. The other
officers were too afraid.
37.
INT. GORDON HOME - BARBARA'S BEDROOM - YEARS AGO - NIGHT
BARBARA GORDON, 8 years old, sits in her bed. She's wearing a nightgown and her red hair is braided into pig tails. She giggles.
BARBARA
They were afraid of water?
Jim sits in a chair nearby.
JIM
It wasn't the water. It was
that they couldn't see on
the other side of it. They
were afraid of what they
couldn't see.
LEE THOMPKINS walks in through the open door.
LEE
Sweetie? Shouldn't you be
asleep?
BARBARA
Daddy was just telling me
a story.
Lee smiles.
LEE
Oh! Daddy tells the best
stories.
The smile stays on her face though her eyes show suspicion as she looks at her husband.
LEE (CONT'D)
Was Daddy telling an
appropriate story?
Jim begins to look uncomfortable under his wife's gaze.
JIM
Umm...
INT. EDITH'S OFFICE
Edith lets go of the gun, it returns to her waist. She pulls an empty cylinder from her UTILITY BELT and replaces it with a cylinder from the drawer which is full of the grey beads.
She lifts the right side of her dress and replaces another cylinder of the FOG BOMBS. She also replaces the two batarangs to her right side before letting the dress fall. She shuts the drawer.
38.
BATMAN (O.S.)
Oh, no.
Edith turns to the camera in the corner.
EDITH
What?
BATMAN (O.S.)
With the guards distracted
there's been a breach. Cell
Block C. Lynns has taken an
orderly hostage and is
forcing him to open all the
doors.
We CLOSE ON Edith's face as her eyebrows raise in shock.
INT. THERAPY ROOM 17 - THIS MORNING
Harley chuckles.
HARLEY
Bet you ain't even been
through a break-out yet,
huh?
INT. EDITH'S OFFICE
Edith blinks.
BATMAN (O.S.)
This is too big. I'm on my
way.
Edith pulls the glasses from the top of her head, the same look of determination on her face, and puts them in the pocket of her lab coat.
EDITH
No.
She reaches to her right shoulder beneath the coat and opens the dress, it breaks away along the right side, attached with magnets. She lets the dress and lab coat fall together to the floor.
EDITH (CONT'D)
You would be too late and I
need you on the monitors.
Beneath the padded dress she isn't soft at all and the jet black costume clings to her trim, athletic frame. The top of the chest curls down over her bosom and the cowl rests at her stomach. From the back of the cowl a short, thick cape hangs down like an apron.
39.
She flips the cape over her head, it settles over the long, thin cape which always hangs from the back of her shoulders, and snugs her face into the jaw-piece of the cowl. The lenses are still red and she turns a dial at her temple to cycle through purple then yellow then clear. The back of the neck curls around to join magnetically with the front.
She slips her hands into the gloves which hang from her utility belt along her outer thighs. From the pointed fingertips to the knobbed spikes which extend past her elbows, the gauntlets are weapons themselves, with a double row of fins along the forearms like serrated teeth and thorn-like spikes on the knuckles of her fists.
The entire change takes mere seconds and she leaps to the door. She turns to the camera, her hand on the doorknob.
BATGIRL
Hallway clear?
There is a pause.
BATMAN (O.S.)
Yes, and I'll scrub the
video.
INT. OFFICE HALLWAY - NIGHT
Batgirl emerges from Edith's office, SLAMMING THE DOOR and RUNNING down the hall, straight at the closed elevator.
BATGIRL
Open the doors.
The doors open, revealing the elevator shaft. She LEAPS into it, the grapple gun in her hand.
INT. ELEVATOR SHAFT
Batgirl kicks the back wall of the shaft as she FIRES A PITON into it.
BATGIRL'S POV: We look down to see another set of doors open, several stories below and approaching fast. At the top of the screen we see 'FREE FALL DETECTED'. At the bottom of the screen: 'CAPE ACTIVE' and along the sides are icons showing the cape in various configurations.
OBJECTIVE POV: Batgirl hits the brakes on the gun and swings forward and into-
40.
INT. CELL BLOCK C - LOBBY/CORRIDORS
Batgirl swings through the elevator doors, the momentum carrying her up as she lets out line.
CLOSE-UP: She looks to the side and blinks quickly.
BATGIRL'S POV: One icon, showing the cape jutting forward to either side, blinks rapidly. The word 'SOAR' appears.
OBJECTIVE POV: The cape takes on the SOAR configuration and she rises rapidly as she knocks the reel out of the gun.
CLOSE-UP: She looks a different way and blinks quickly.
The cape takes on a GLIDE configuration and she flies down the corridor, close to the high ceiling. She veers right then left before coming upon the DOZEN ESCAPEES, with Lynns in the front. One of the escapees holds the Orderly, his arm twisted behind his back. Another sees her and gapes, pointing.
ESCAPEE #1
BAT!
They all look up.
LYNNS
Batm-
Batgirl pulls her cape down to her sides, PLUMMETING FEET FIRST into Lynns' chest. He hits the floor with the same BOOM we hear in the Arkham game when the last opponent falls.
We hear 'INTO THE FIRE' by CRUCIFIED BARBARA as grey fog expands throughout the corridor. The last we see of Batgirl is her changing the lenses on her mask to red.
BATGIRL'S POV: We see, in infrared, as she pummels the blinded escapees with fists, feet, elbows, and knees. She frees the Orderly and sits him down by the wall.
BATGIRL
(distorted voice)
Stay down.
BATMAN (O.S.)
You need his keycard.
BATGIRL'S POV: She takes the keycard, it is just a small dark rectangle in infrared, from around his neck.
41.
OBJECTIVE POV: The fog has dissipated to near waist level and the escapees try to fight back but she has the advantage and appears out of the fog to strike a few times then duck down to appear somewhere else.
She KICKS one escapee into an empty cell. Another grabs her from behind and she FLIPS him over her in a judo throw that lands him in the cell too. She puts the card into the keypad and yanks it out again. The glass door SLAMS down like the blade of a guillotine. She ducks into the fog again.
The escapees are all looking around in expectation. She appears in a spot away from them, the grapple gun in her hand. It isn't loaded with a piton, though; there are four spikes, all pointed outward. SHE FIRES and the spikes spread to reveal A NET which sweeps three of them into an open cell.
Batgirl disappears into the fog again, only to reappear with another net loaded. Two more get scooped into a cell. She disappears again as the remaining four rush toward her.
ESCAPEE #2
Wait! Just stay away from
the cells! Back to back!
The escapees stand back to back in the center of the corridor. One suddenly SCREAMS and disappears into the fog, WHIPPED AWAY feet first. They look in the direction he went to see Batgirl pop out of the fog near a cell. She puts in the keycard and pulls it out again; the DOOR SLAMS and the escapee BANGS ON THE GLASS as she ducks down again.
A few seconds later it happens again, so that only two remain. The fog has dissipated to near knee level. The two are nervous but try to stay ready. They aren't.
Batgirl explodes out of the fog, KICKING THEM BOTH repeatedly, forcing them back. They don't realize they're in a cell until she backs off and SLAMS THE DOOR SHUT.
She turns and RUNS back toward the lobby. Lynns pops out of the fog and cracks her in the jaw with a RIGHT HOOK. The MUSIC STOPS abruptly and SHE HITS THE FLOOR HARD, disappearing into the fog.
LYNNS
You went down easier than
usual.
He KICKS her, she GRUNTS.
LYNNS (CONT'D)
What's the matter, Bats?
Getting old?
42.
He STOMPS down a few times, only missing once.
LYNNS (CONT'D)
Slowing down? Getting too
confident?
BATMAN (O.S.)
Get up! Get up! On your
feet!
Lynns STOMPS AGAIN and STUMBLES a little; she tried to sweep his leg but he kept his feet.
Batgirl stands, a TRICKLE OF BLOOD on the left side of her chin, a few steps away from him. Her lenses are clear again. He looks at her closely.
LYNNS
You're no Batman.
BATGIRL
(distorted voice)
Back in your cage, Lynns.
The decision is visible on Lynns' face: man or not, it's a Bat. He LUNGES FORWARD, JABBING at her jaw. She DUCKS and comes in close, JABBING him in the jaw. Man or not, that hurt. HE STOMP KICKS HER in the GUT, SHE STUMBLES BACK a few steps.
They fight for a while, she's skilled but so is he and he's bigger and stronger. He eventually gets her in a HEADLOCK. She elbows him and tries to stomp his feet but he keeps his hold. SHE BITES HIS ARM and HE SHOUTS and PUSHES HER AWAY.
ESCAPEE #3
Oh no! Does that mean Lynns
is going to turn into a bat?
The escapee in the cell with him looks at him like he's crazy. Lynns looks at the bite-mark and SCOFFS.
LYNNS
Figures. See, you try to
fight like him but you don't
have his size or strength.
BATMAN (O.S.)
He's right. Stop playing his
game. I'm not always the
biggest and strongest. Fight
smarter.
Batgirl nods and turns a little to the side, so Lynns can't see her right side. 'INTO THE FIRE' resumes, softly at first.
43.
She reaches into her short, thick cape and pulls out a coil of the microfilament rope.
She keeps the rope hidden, only showing her left side, as Lynns advances with more PUNCHES. SHE DODGES and BLOCKS, retreating until HE THROWS A KICK. The music has been growing in intensity; at 'I'm always burning brighter than you' SHE CATCHES HIS FOOT in the loop and pulls, circling him.
Lynns is forced to hop on one foot as she builds up enough centrifugal force to HURL him into an empty cell. She SLAMS it shut with the keycard. He RUSHES at the door.
LYNNS
(furious)
AAAAH! I WILL BURN YOU!
They stand face to face, within inches of each other, the glass separating them. There is nothing in the grimly set mouth of Batgirl that would make him think of Doc Laffs.
She tosses the keycard to the bewildered Orderly, still huddled down by the wall, and turns. She runs back toward the lobby as the music fades away.
BATMAN (O.S.)
Oh no.
BATGIRL
Again? Where?
BATMAN (O.S.)
It's Cash. I don't think
he's breathing.
BATGIRL
How long?
BATMAN (O.S.)
Minutes.
BATGIRL
Brain damage can start at
ten. Where?
BATMAN (O.S.)
The basement.
BATGIRL
Doors!
The doors barely open in time for her to jump through them.
44.
INT. ELEVATOR SHAFT
Batgirl jumps into the shaft and the CAPE BILLOWS OUT LIKE A PARACHUTE to slow her descent.
BATMAN (O.S.)
The elevator can't take you
all the way; he's in the
lowest section of the
original building.
The cape changes to glide as she reaches the lowest doors, which are already open.
INT. HOSPITAL CORRIDORS
These corridors are in an abandoned section of the asylum. They once looked like a regular hospital, with white tiles and wide glass windows, but they now look like a warzone, with bullet holes and blood splatters throughout.
Batgirl hits the floor running, the cape flapping behind her.
BATGIRL
Lead me!
BATMAN (O.S.)
Forward. (beat) Take the
next left, then immediate
right. (beat) The next
right. Veer left. (beat)
There's a shortcut ahead
but the doors are sealed;
ready explosive charge.
Batgirl has been following his instructions, RUNNING through the halls and VAULTING occasional OBSTACLES like a gurney or overturned wheelchair. She PULLS A GRENADE from her belt.
BATMAN (O.S.) (CONT'D)
Turn right. Those doors,
blast them.
She turns right and skids to a halt. She pushes a button on the grenade, it shines red, and throws it at the steel doors ahead of her. She ducks and covers herself with her cape as it explodes.
INT. STONE STAIRCASE
The steel doors, chained together, are hanging loosely by their lower hinges. Smoke is billowing around them. There are TWO KICKS from the other side and they CRASH to the floor. Batgirl emerges as the smoke clears.
45.
BATMAN (O.S.)
Down the stairs.
She LEAPS over the rail, her cape parachuting her down. There is an unconscious guard at the bottom; she lands near him and looks over him, feeling for his pulse first.
BATGIRL
He's alive. Broken arm. No
sign of neck injury but
he'll need a full X-ray.
BATMAN (O.S.)
He's better off than Cash;
hurry.
Batgirl leaves him and runs down the same hallway that Harley had been talking to.
INT. BASEMENT CORRIDOR
Batgirl turns into the corridor, first seeing Joan lying there unconscious.
BATGIRL
Dr. Leland?
BATMAN (O.S.)
I didn't see what happened
to her; I was watching you.
But she's breathing.
She sees Cash, the cord wrapped around his neck. She rushes to him and unwinds the cord before feeling for a pulse.
BATGIRL
Pulse is weak. He's
breathing, but shallowly.
There's a chance of neck
injury but I'll have to
turn him to administer
mouth-to-mouth.
BATMAN (O.S.)
No. Use your rebreather, set
it to revive.
She pulls a mask, very much like a gas-mask, from her short cape and fits it around Cash's face. She pushes a button on it and we hear the soft HUM of a small motor. Cash begins breathing more noticeably. She checks his pulse at the wrist.
BATGIRL
Pulse is strengthening. Now
I'll check on Leland.
46.
BATMAN (O.S.)
I reviewed the tape; she
just hit her head.
BATGIRL
Just? That's her second
possible concussion today.
She crouches by Joan and gently pulls her eyelid open. She removes a small pen-light from her belt and shines it over her eye. The pupil contracts and Batgirl lets out a sigh of relief.
BATGIRL (CONT'D)
She seems fine.
She keeps her head down for a while. When she looks up, right at a surveillance camera, she looks angry.
BATGIRL (CONT'D)
This is your fault. All of
it.
She stands, her eyes never wavering from the camera.
BATGIRL (CONT'D)
You didn't give me 24 hours
with Quinn. Just cut her
loose and see where she
runs? Well, she ran. Amok.
And you should have-
BATMAN (O.S.)
You're right.
Batgirl registers surprise briefly but returns to a poker face.
BATMAN (O.S.) (CONT'D)
I knew Quinn was a loose
cannon and I fired her
anyway. Even as you were
warning me not to.
Batgirl turns and looks at the scene. She changes the lenses on her mask to yellow.
BATGIRL'S POV: We see, through the yellow filter of the lenses, footprints on the floor, Cash's and Harley's. We move forward, following Harley's.
BATMAN (O.S.) (CONT'D)
Arkham is your jurisdiction,
I shouldn't take such a
heavy hand. If I didn't
trust your judgment, I
wouldn't have put you there.
47.
OBJECTIVE POV: Batgirl, following the footprints, laughs
BATGIRL
She skipped backward after
her victory.
She walks toward the alcove, not looking up from the floor until she gets to the door. She looks at it, then changes the lenses back to clear and looks at the floor again. She stoops down and takes the key from the padlock, standing with the keyring on her finger.
BATGIRL (CONT'D)
Cash's keys. This is why she
did it. It wasn't vengeance
at all.
She looks at another surveillance camera.
BATGIRL (CONT'D)
She needed these keys to
get through these doors.
Doors I've never seen on
any blueprint.
INT. BATCAVE
We see Batgirl and the Basement Corridor through three different cameras. Batgirl is looking directly into the one closest to her.
BATGIRL
What's on the other side?
There is a pause.
BATMAN (O.C.)
A dungeon. Carved out of
the bedrock, probably by
the forced labor of former
patients. I've explored it
before; believe me, you
don't want to.
BATGIRL
But if the exit is through
there...
BATMAN (O.C.)
It doesn't matter. I'll
wall over that whole alcove.
I'll send a construction
crew in the morning. In the
meantime-
Batgirl suddenly looks at the doors and backs away.
48.
BATMAN (O.C.) (CONT'D)
What is it?
INT. BASEMENT CORRIDOR
We hear RAPID FOOTSTEPS. HARLEY BURSTS THROUGH THE DOOR, PANTING. Batgirl is caught flat-footed but Harley doesn't notice her. She SLAMS the door shut and wraps the chain back around the handles as fast as she can. She snaps the padlock through it and sighs in relief. She turns, seeing Batgirl, and GASPS.
HARLEY
My superego!
BATGIRL
Huh?
BATMAN (O.S.)
Hit her!
Batgirl hits Harley with a right hook. Harley's head whips to the side and then back.
HARLEY
Was it something I said?
BATMAN (O.S.)
Harder!
SLO-MO: Batgirl jumps into an uppercut that takes Harley off her feet and flat on her back.
REGULAR MOTION: Batgirl looks down at her, panting. Batman is panting too.
BATGIRL
Oh, Harley, what have you
done now?
FADE OUT:
Harley's escape attempt lands her in the Maximum Secuity cell block. And who should she find in the cell right next to hers than her best frenemy for life, Eddie... as in Nygma.
FADE IN:
EXT. ARKHAM ASYLUM - NIGHT
We hear 'BAD DAYS' by THE FLAMING LIPS as we focus on 'ARKHAM' above the front gate. At 'stuck where you are' we cut to 'ASYLUM' and focus on that.
INT. ARKHAM - MAXIMUM SECURITY LOBBY
We focus on the word 'MAXIMUM' stenciled in black on the grey cinder block wall, then on the word 'SECURITY'. We focus in turn on each of the five large and cruel looking guards.
INT. MAXIMUM SECURITY CORRIDOR
We TRUCK LEFT AND SLOWLY PAN RIGHT down the corridor of cells. These cells are far smaller than those of Cell Blocks A, B, or C, and the glass doors to each are only four feet wide. We stop at one through which we can see the back of a man sleeping on his side.
INT. EDDIE'S CELL
EDWARD NYGMA, AKA THE RIDDLER but we'll just call him EDDIE, rolls over on the narrow bed. He looks depressed. He looks broken. He looks angry at being woken in the middle of the night.
As the music fades we hear what has awoken him: everyone on the cell block is shouting and jeering. One voice rings out clearer than the others:
INMATE #1
Hey, lookee at the clown
princess!
A look of hope appears on Eddie's face in the form of a sadistic smile. He rushes to the door to look out - and the smile blossoms into a sadistic grin.
INT. MAXIMUM SECURITY CORRIDOR
Harley Quinn, in a straight jacket, is walking down the corridor. Behind her is Bolton, with his signature, old-fashioned, wooden Billy club, and flanking him are two guards armed with cattle prods.
HARLEY
I heard you missed me,
I'm back!
2.
EDDIE
Welcome back!
She sees him and rolls her eyes. Then she crosses them and sticks her tongue out at him. He laughs, a great belly laugh that only stops when Bolton grabs Harley's arm and brings her to a halt in front of the cell next to his. Harley and Eddie look at each other in horror.
HARLEY
What are you doin'?
EDDIE
(overlapping)
What are you doing?
Bolton puts his card into the keypad.
HARLEY
You're not putting me in
there!
EDDIE
(overlapping)
You're not putting her in
there!
HARLEY
You're not putting me next
to him!
EDDIE
(overlapping)
You get her away from me!
Bolton has opened the door and tries to force Harley into the cell but she struggles.
HARLEY
Find me another cell! Any
cell! There's got to be
another cell in here! Lock
me in a dumpster if you
have to!
EDDIE
(overlapping)
You get her out of here!
She can't stay there! She
is not staying there! You
find her another cell! You
heard her, lock her in a
dumpster!
BOLTON
(overlapping)
Zap her!
One of the guards with cattle prods zaps her. She screams.
3.
EDDIE
Fight it, Quinn, fight it!
Bolton grabs Harley and tosses her into the cell. She jumps to her feet and runs at him but he yanks out the key card and the door slams shut in her face. Both she and Eddie are shouting incoherently at him. He hits first her door and then his with his club.
BOLTON
Shut up! Both of you!
Bolton and the other guards walk away and the inmates settle down. We are left looking at Harley, on our left, and Eddie, on our right, both staring miserably ahead as they stand in their respective cells. They speak to each other cordially.
HARLEY
How ya doin', Eddie?
EDDIE
Hey ya, Quinn.
He tocuches his wrist for a moment, as if checking his pulse. They fume for just a moment more before Harley looks toward him (though they can't see each other through the wall, they look towards the other when they talk) with a nasty grin.
HARLEY
I almost beat your record.
EDDIE
Oh, I heard. And as almost
impressive as that is
YOU'RE STILL HERE!
He turns away in disgust and anger. Harley sighs.
HARLEY
Well, I hit a snag.
Eddie looks back at her in suspicion.
EDDIE
What snag?
HARLEY
Hey, have you ever heard
of a Doctor... uh, Strange?
EDDIE
Yeah, he's a comic book
character, what are you
dating twelve-year-olds
now?
4.
HARLEY
No, no, a real guy! Uh...
Hugo! Hugo Strange!
Eddie suddenly looks bitter.
EDDIE
Oh, Professor Strange.
(beat) He was director here
for a while. Probably while
you were in Belle. Got
fired for performing
experiments on the patients.
(snidely) And isn't that an
unethical practice?
HARLEY
Yeah, well he's still doing
it. He's got Ivy, Victor,
and Belfry locked up in the
dungeon level. He's
torturing them-
EDDIE
(overlapping)
Who, who, and what?
HARLEY
Ivy and Vic- God, you are
such a self-absorbed
asshole! People we know!
People we've known - for
years!
EDDIE
(overlapping)
Oh, oh, oh! Freeze and...
Plant Girl, right. Wait,
who was that other one?
HARLEY
Belfry? Uh... You remember
Kirk Langstrom, accidentally
turned himself into a bat?
EDDIE
(laughing)
Oh, the Bat! The Manbat, I
forgot about that! What did
you call him, Belfry? Good
one.
Harley rolls her eyes.
HARLEY
Yeah, thanks. Anyway, this
Strange guy's got 'em locked
up down there, he's killing
them!
5.
EDDIE
What does that have to do
with you?
HARLEY
Well, I'm not going to leave
them in the hands of some
mad scientist!
EDDIE
That's kind of funny
considering all three of
them are mad scientists.
HARLEY
That's not fair, it's not
like they did that to
themselves on purpose!
EDDIE
Oh, you're right. Maybe we
should just call them...
clumsy scientists.
Harley frowns and shrugs.
HARLEY
OK, you're right, mad
scientist sounds better.
Anyway, I had to come back
till I could think of a
way to spring them too.
EDDIE
Or you could have
continued your escape
and returned with the
means to spring them.
HARLEY
I didn't think of that.
EDDIE
Of course without his
freeze suit ol' Vickie
would be dead in minutes
at room temperature.
HARLEY
Oh, I didn't think of
that either.
Eddie sighs dramatically.
EDDIE
Oh, how the mighty have
fallen.
HARLEY
What's that supposed to mean?
6.
EDDIE
It's just that back when
you were Doctor Quinzel,
I considered you to be one
of my most formidable
adversaries.
Harley smiles at the compliment.
HARLEY
Thank you, Eddie.
EDDIE
Now you're just annoying.
HARLEY
Fuck you, Eddie.
Eddie chuckles.
EDDIE
I will never forget that
New Year's Eve...
INT. ARKHAM - REC ROOM - YEARS EARLIER
Eddie, wearing a green suit and bowler hat, fires a shotgun into the ceiling. He grins at the frightened shouts this elicits and points the shotgun around the room at the staff members in silver conical hats that stand against the walls, their hands tied. A number of inmates are holding weapons and several guards, including Cash before the hook, are among the hostages.
EDDIE
Riddle me this! Twelve
disciples have I, for one
to live the last must die.
He juts the shotgun in Harleen's face. She quakes in fear.
EDDIE (CONT'D)
What am I?
Harleen is shaking like a leaf in a hurricane.
HARLEEN
A - a year?
Eddie gasps in mock surprise.
EDDIE
Happy New Year, Dr. Quinzel,
you get to live.
7.
He moves the shotgun to the COWORKER on her right.
EDDIE (CONT'D)
But I've got a tough one
for you.
The Coworker whimpers. Eddie laughs.
EDDIE (CONT'D)
Who makes it has no need of
it. Who buys it has no use
for it. Who uses it can
neither see nor feel it.
What is it?
The Coworker stammers. Eddie begins moving the shotgun back and forth between their left and right eyes, making 'tick-tock' sounds with his tongue.
HARLEEN
It's a coffin.
Eddie moves the shotgun back to her, she shivers again.
EDDIE
Dr. Quinzel... that is not
how this game is played.
Harleen swallows and takes in a ragged breath.
HARLEEN
What has plenty of eyes but
can't see?
Eddie's eyes widen in shock.
EDDIE
That is not how this works
at all!
HARLEEN
What's the matter, you
don't know it? It's a-
EDDIE
It's a potato, I know what
it is! What has one eye
and can't see?
HARLEEN
A needle. What happens
twice in a moment, once
in a minute, but never
in a thousand years?
EDDIE
The letter 'm'; these are
children's riddles!
8.
HARLEEN
What's the end of everything?
EDDIE
The letter 'g' and it is my
turn!
The inmates holding weapons begin to pay more attention to the riddle contest than to their hostages. Cash notices this and catches the eyes of a few of the other guards who nod back.
EDDIE (CONT'D)
Poor people have it and rich
people need it but if you
eat it, you die. What is it?
Harleen thinks a second. And then more seconds. She starts to sweat as Eddie starts to smile.
HARLEEN
Nothing!
Eddie looks disappointed. Harleen sighs in relief. Cash cathces her eye and signals with his tied hands to keep going. She notices the number of inmates watching her.
EDDIE
What's the matter? You out?
Can't think of any riddles
beyond a fourth grade level?
HARLEEN
No, no, I've got one. I've
got a good one. I've got a
really good one!
All of the inmates turn toward her. She looks Eddie in the eye.
HARLEEN (CONT'D)
What is the only moment in
time that can never be
remembered or predicted?
Cash puts his tied hands over the head of the inmate in front of him, grabbing his shotgun.
CASH
Now!
Eddie turns to chastise whoever broke the rules. He sees his flunkies overrun by guards and other staff members. He turns back to Harleen is absolute shock.
9.
INT. MAXIMUM SECURITY CORRIDOR
Eddie is now sitting in front of his door. He chuckles and shakes his head ruefully.
EDDIE
An intern beat me at my own
game. I will never forget
that. Or forgive, needless
to say.
Harley, still in the straight jacket, is sitting in front of her door too. She doesn't seem as happy with the memory.
HARLEY
Yeah. Yeah, I remember.
INT. REC ROOM - YEARS EARLIER
Eddie's shock turns to rage in an instant.
EDDIE
You little bitch!
He points the shotgun at her head, she screams and collapses, he pulls the trigger. Coworkers grab him and strip the gun away. Harleen is sitting on the floor, still screaming in panic. Joan runs over to her and tries to calm her down.
EDDIE (O.C.) (CONT'D)
This isn't over! This is
not over!
HARLEEN
(sobbing)
I can't do this! I can't do
this! I can't do this, Dr.
Leland!
JOAN
Yes, you can. Yes, you can.
HARLEEN
No, I can't, I can't, I'm
not strong enough!
JOAN
Yes, you are. Yes, you are.
You need time to process
this but you are strong
enough.
INT. THERAPY ROOM 17 - DAY
JOAN (O.S.)
You are strong enough.
10.
Harley is handcuffed to the chair, Edith is writing.
HARLEY
But I wasn't. I knew I
wasn't. I wasn't strong
enough to be what she
needed me to be. So I
thought... maybe a little
liquid courage.
INT. HARLEEN'S APARTMENT - KITCHEN - NIGHT
Harleen pours rum into a glass filled with ice. She tries to pour some soda into it as well but only a few drops spill out. She looks into the can as if trying to see where the rest of it is hiding. Not finding any, she crumples the can and tosses it into a pile of others.
She picks up the glass and leans back against the counter. She is wearing a tank top and boxer shorts. Her hair is still tied up from work. She takes a sip and walks out of the room.
INT. HARLEEN'S APARTMENT - BATHROOM
Harleen looks at herself in the mirror and takes another sip. She sets the glass on the sink and takes off her glasses, setting them on a shelf and picking up a brush. She lets down her hair and begins brushing it. She reaches a tender spot at the top of her scalp and flinches.
HARLEEN
Ow!
She feels the spot with her other hand, then sets down the brush to feel it with both. She has to work at it for a few seconds, squinting in pain as she finally works it loose.
She looks at it but it is too blurry and she has to put her glasses back on to see it clearly. It is a small piece of buckshot, stained with her blood.
It takes her a moment to realize what it is. When she does she retches involuntarily, almost throwing up. She drops it and collapses into a ball.
She sits there in the corner between the wall and the tub, her hands pressed to her ears as she watches the little ball of lead bounce on the tile floor.
An image of herself in pigtails appears in the mirror.
HARLEY
Hey, hey, don't do that!
You're spiralling; knock
it off! That?
(MORE)
11.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
That's nothing! It's just a
little piece of buckshot,
probably ricocheted off the
wall... I mean, look at that,
you're tougher than you
thought; it barely broke the
skin!
Harleen looks up at the mirror in horror.
HARLEEN
I quit.
She runs out of the bathroom, her mirror image trying to see where she's going.
HARLEY
What? Quit? Quit what? Hey,
what are you talking about?
INT. HARLEEN'S APARTMENT - HALLWAY/LIVING ROOM
Harleen races down the hall where another mirror hangs.
HARLEY
Hey, wait a minute, let's
talk about this!
Harleen runs at top speed until she stops at a small end table where lays her phone and a Harlequin romance novel. She tries to get her breathing under control.
HARLEEN
I'll just - I'll just call
Dr. Leland and tell her that
I resign.
She puts her hand on the phone but another hand pins it. She looks up to see herself with pigtails.
HARLEY
You ain't resigning shit;
sit down!
Harleen SCREAMS AND FALLS BACKWARD onto the couch. She looks up in disbelief as her doppelganger chews her out, stabbing an accusing finger the whole time.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
We did not go through years
of medical school just for
you to flake out and quit
your first job! Yeah, so
it's a tough gig; we knew
that going in!
12.
HARLEEN
But I almost died!
HARLEY
Yeah, well... suck it up!
Be a man! Or... woman or...
a doctor! Look, just take a
pill, have a drink! Hell, it
worked for Dad and he got
shot at like twice a week!
INT. THERAPY ROOM 17
EDITH
What?
Harley looks at her, surprised. Edith looks embarrassed.
EDITH (CONT'D)
I'm sorry. I didn't mean to
interrupt. It's just... what
did your father do that got
him shot at?
HARLEY
He was a garbage man.
EDITH
Huh?
BATMAN (O.S.)
He was a low level thug for
the Falcones. Specialized in
disposing bodies.
HARLEY
(overlapping)
On the East End.
She says this as if it is the only explanation needed.
EDITH
Oh! East End...
She makes a note in the file. She looks over it for a moment and clears her throat.
EDITH (CONT'D)
So, to continue... you didn't
resign.
HARLEY
No. No, I decided to follow
my own advice.
13.
INT. HARLEEN'S APARTMENT - LIVING ROOM - NIGHT
Harleen sits on the couch, her hair half brushed. In one hand is a pill, in the other the rum with a drop of soda.
HARLEY (V.O.)
Take a pill.
Harleen takes the pill and washes it down with the rum.
HARLEY (V.O.)
Have a drink.
Harleen takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly.
HARLEY (V.O.)
That became like my mantra.
Any time things got bad at
work I'd just remind myself,
'As soon as you get home,
take a pill, have a drink.'
EDITH (V.O.)
And did you ever... not
wait... to get home?
Harleen looks at us, surprised. After a moment...
HARLEEN
Sometimes.
She averts her eyes, as if embarrassed, and swallows.
HARLEEN (CONT'D)
Like when I had to face
him again for the first
time. When I had to...
She looks back at us, her jaw set.
HARLEEN (CONT'D)
Do what I'd decided to do.
She finishes the drink in one gulp.
INT. THERAPY ROOM 17 - PAST/PRESENT
Eddie is in a straight jacket. Harleen walks in. Eddie grins at her as she sets down the file and sits opposite him.
14.
EDDIE
Well, Dr. Quinzel, I am
impressed. Why, when I left
you wallowing in a puddle
of tears I didn't think I'd
ever see you again.
HARLEEN
I had to see you again, Mr.
Nygma. I have to apologize.
Eddie is confused.
HARLEEN (CONT'D)
I have failed you. As a
doctor. The medications I
prescribed are clearly
inadequate. We will
discontinue them
immediately and begin a
new course of treatment
when they have cleared
your system in a week.
Eddie laughs.
EDDIE
Oh, doctor. I know you're
new here but surely you
realize that several of
my medications require a
tapering off period. You
can't just cut them off
cold turkey.
HARLEEN
Actually I can.
Eddie's smile fades quickly as he looks into her cold gaze.
HARLEEN (CONT'D)
I view it as an experiment.
Experiencing withdrawal
from so many different
medications at once... I
think the results might
prove fascinating.
Eddie begins to look scared.
EDDIE
Dr. Quinzel-
HARLEEN
You'll be completely
isolated, of course, for
the safety of others. But
you will be under constant
observation. Unfortunately,
due to the nature of the
experiment, no sedation can
be administered.
15.
He begins to stammer as she makes a few notes in the file. She closes it and stands.
HARLEEN (CONT'D)
We will meet back in one
week and consider a new
course of treatment.
She walks to the door.
EDDIE
But doctor!
She stops at the door and turns back toward him.
EDDIE (CONT'D)
This is torture!
HARLEEN
It's not torture, Mr.
Nygma. (beat) It's science.
She knocks on the door. It is opened and we ZOOM IN SLOWLY on her as she walks out.
EDDIE (O.C.)
(sobbing)
Please, Dr. Quinzel. Please.
The door closes. We PAN RIGHT to see Edith writing and Harley staring at the door. Edith looks up at her.
EDITH
That was-
HARLEY
(biting)
What? Unethical?
Unprofessional?
EDITH
Understandable. He attacked
you, you attacked him in the
only way you could.
Harley sighs, visibly lowering her defenses.
HARLEY
Thanks, Doc, but what it
was, was stupid. I realized
that last night talking to
him. All we ever do is
attack each other. Even when
we were working together.
Edith seems confused for just a second but realizes what she means.
16.
EDITH
Oh, you mean in criminal
pursuits.
Harley laughs.
HARLEY
You talk funny, Doc. Yeah,
criminal pursuits.
EDITH
But if you hated each other,
why would you work together?
Harley shrugs.
HARLEY
A job's a job. And hate him
or not he knows his business.
EXT. GOTHAM ROOFTOPS/ALLEYS - YEARS AGO
We hear 'BEEN CAUGHT STEALING' by JANE'S ADDICTION. We see Eddie, Harley, and sometimes just GOONS dressed as clowns set up little trophies that resemble green question marks throughout the city in unusual and hard to reach places.
HARLEY (V.O.)
First, we'd set up a trail
of bat-bait, you know, a
little scavenger hunt to
keep him busy.
INT. VAN - DAY
Eddie, Harley, and the Goons are crowded in the van. Eddie looks at his phone: BAT-BAIT #1' shows on the screen. He shows it to Harley and they grin at each other.
HARLEY (V.O.)
Then, when we knew exactly
where he was...
INT. JEWELRY STORE - DAY
Eddie, Harley, and the Goons rush inside, all armed.
HARLEY (V.O.)
We'd be on the other side of
town.
EDDIE
Alright, nobody panic! (beat)
Aw, screw it, go ahead and
panic!
17.
He fires a shotgun into the ceiling, shattered glass rains down. There is screaming and Harley laughs.
The Goons fill bags while Eddie and Harley try on jewelry. Despite being mortal enemies, they seem to be having the time of their lives together. They take selfies and Harley writes 'SUCK IT BATS' on one with a graffiti font.
INT. BANK - VAULT ROOM
Eddie aims his cane at the vault, shooting plastic explosives at key points. He and Harley take cover around the corner as he flips open the handle and presses one of several buttons there. The explosives detonate and the vault swings open.
As Goons load up bags of cash, Harley and Eddie are dancing (not with each other, just to the music) and occasionally throwing up wads of cash so that it rains down on them.
INT. CAR DEALERSHIP - NIGHT
Eddie is standing before a cabinet with a digital keypad lock. He presses another button on his cane and the numbers on the display of the keypad start filling themselves in. There is a BUZZ and the cabinet opens to reveal dozens of car keys. Harley grabs several keys and passes them out to the eager Goons.
HARLEY
You get a car, and you get
a car, and you get a car...
EXT. GOTHAM STREETS - NIGHT
Harley, Eddie, and the Goons all speed through traffic in sports cars, breaking as many laws as they can think of on the way to the chop shop.
HARLEY (V.O.)
But Batsy knows his business
too and eventually...
EXT. ALLEYS/STREETS - NIGHT
Harley, Eddie, and the Goons carry heavy bags to the van. There is a WHOOSH and a HISS. Then another WHOOSH and HISS. The song fades. Harley looks at the front tire as it deflates, a batarang sticking out of it. Eddie looks at the rear tire to see the same thing. They look at each other.
18.
HARLEY
Bad?
EDDIE
Beat it.
We hear 'BEAT IT' by MICHAEL JACKSON as Harley and Eddie run as fast as they can. The Goons look confused until one of them screams as he is hoisted feet first into the air.
Most of the Goons run after Harley and Eddie, two fire pistols blindly into the sky. Batarangs disarm them and we turn and follow the fleeing Goons to the street as we hear the attacking Goons get pulverized.
We hear a WHOOSH as something shoots past us; it is a microfilament rope which ensnares a Goon in front of us. He is then YANKED OFF HIS FEET as the rope is reeled in and he flies past us. We speed up, overtaking a Goon just as a net covers his body and he falls forward.
HARLEY (O.C.)
Over here!
The Goons ahead of us trun toward the sound and we look to see Harley and Eddie in an alley. We follow the Goons into the alley.
EDDIE
We make a stand here! All
for one!
There are grunts of agreement as the Goons take cover behind dumpsters. We hunker down too. We turn to see Harley and Eddie running for their lives, still carrying bags of loot.
We hear GUNFIRE and turn back to see a batarang knock out the Goon nearest us. Something is tossed at us and we hear something METAL CLATTER at our feet. We look down just as the SMOKE BOMB goes off.
Smoke fills the air. We hear COUGHING, then PUNCHING AND GRUNTS. Then a black gauntlet in the shape of a fist flies right at us-
Harley and Eddie are running down a street. Harley suddenly throws her bags at Eddie's feet and, as he falls, runs as hard as she can with fists and knees pumping high.
Eddie looks up from where he lies in the street.
EDDIE (CONT'D)
Harley Quinn, you-
19.
There is a WHOOSH and he looks to the side and then up. He is terrified.
EDDIE (CONT'D)
Batman!
He points in the direction Harley fled.
EDDIE (CONT'D)
Quick! She's getting away!
INT. EDDIE'S CELL
Eddie is still sitting by the door.
EDDIE
Hey, Quinn.
HARLEY (O.S.)
(muffled, impatient)
What?
EDDIE
You know I hate you, right?
INT. HARLEY'S CELL
Harley manages to extricate herself from the straight jacket, wisps of her hair raised in static electricity and clinging to her sweaty face. She is breathing heavily.
HARLEY
Right back at ya, kid.
She tosses the jacket at the door.
EDDIE (O.S.)
Took you long enough.
HARLEY
Shut up!
She smooths out her hair as she moves to the door, laying on the jacket and pressing her sweaty forehead to the cool glass.
EDDIE (O.S.)
I was thinking about your
little problem. It seems
to me, you're probably
going to need my help.
Harley lets out a weary sigh.
20.
HARLEY
Probably.
INT. MAXIMUM SECURITY CORRIDOR
Eddie turns to her.
EDDIE
The way I see it, your little
solo skit didn't play out so
well. So what you need to do
now is put on a proper
production.
Harley turns to him.
HARLEY
I was thinking the same
thing. And Act I is already
under way.
EDDIE
Yeah, I figured. But how
are we going to pull off
Act II from down here?
Harley smirks.
HARLEY
Actually, you've already
given me a pretty good
idea for that. Hey, how
are the boys anyway? I
saw them at lunch
yesterday, they didn't
seem very talkative.
Eddie looks at her like she's stupid, a pointless task since she can't see him. He sighs heavily.
EDDIE
They're pathetic. Penguin,
Two-Face... they haven't
even tried to bust out in
years.
HARLEY
Oh, man, that sucks. I
mean, don't get me wrong
I hate guts but... I'd
rather see them dead than
broken.
She and Eddie both look serious for a moment.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
They never really win till
you give up.
21.
EDDIE
You said it, sister.
They are quiet for a second.
EDDIE (CONT'D)
Lynns still has the spark.
Harley laughs.
HARLEY
You can always count on ol'
Lynnsey to have a spark.
Anybody else?
EDDIE
Most of the better known
ones are gone. We're
probably the only two in
here who knows where.
HARLEY
Fuckin' Waller.
EDDIE
Yeah. At least she took
Calendar Man.
Harley snorts.
HARLEY
(laughing)
Calendar Man? Why the fuck
would she want Calendar Man?
EDDIE
(laughing)
I don't know.
They laugh for a while.
EDDIE (CONT'D)
So what is this brilliant
plan I inspired to put
together Act II?
Harley chuckles evilly.
22.
INT. THERAPY ROOM 17 - DAY
HARLEY
So last night we're yelling
at each other through the
wall and I realize for all
the years we've had this
antagonistic relationship,
we've never really talked
about what's at the root
of it.
EDITH
And you think that might
help. Talking through it.
HARLEY
And he's not the only one.
Yesterday in the cafeteria,
I mean, you should have
seen the way they looked
at me... Harvey, Oswald,
Lynns... and we used to be
tight!
Edith taps her pencil on the file, humming thoughtfully.
EDITH
That gives me an idea.
What if we were to set
up... like a group therapy.
You all have so much in
common and so much history.
BATMAN (O.S.)
That is a terrible idea.
HARLEY
(overlapping)
That is a great idea, Doc!
Edith smiles, almost blushing, and looks up, toward the surveillance camera.
EDITH
I'm glad you think so.
She returns her focus to the file in front of her.
EDITH (CONT'D)
Now, I think we have made
tremendous progress today
but before we close the
session I have to ask...
She looks at Harley expectantly but Harley acts clueless.
EDITH (CONT'D)
Your escape attempt last
night?
23.
HARLEY
Oh! That! Well... I guess
my wrist was swollen when
they cuffed me, and when
the swelling went down I
could slip out of it,
and... I don't know, I
couldn't help myself. When
a dog finds the gate open
he chases cars, you know?
EDITH
Where were you trying to
go? You were found
unconscious in a disused
section of the original
building.
INT. BASEMENT CORRIDOR - THE PREVIOUS NIGHT
Batgirl is standing over Harley's unconscious body. She's panting slightly.
BATMAN (O.S.)
You'll have to move fast
before they regain
consciousness. First,
replace Cash's keys.
Batgirl looks at the keys, which are still in her left hand. She runs to Cash and hooks them to his belt.
BATMAN (O.S.) (CONT'D)
Next, grab your rebreather.
She takes the gas mask-like rebreather off of him and replaces it in her short, thick cape.
BATMAN (O.S.) (CONT'D)
Now rewrap the cord around
his neck. Not so tight he
can't breathe but tight
enough that he'll believe
he was pulled off his feet
with it.
She rewraps the cord around his neck carefully but quickly.
BATMAN (O.S.) (CONT'D)
Then disable the cameras.
There is no way I can alter
the footage believably so
you'll have to make it look
like they've been out of
commission for years due to
old age. Apply peracetic
acid to the wire connections.
Batgirl reaches to the back of her utility belt and produces a small vial.
24.
She runs to one camera and, though she has to stand on her toes to reach it, squeezes a couple of drops on the wire connection. It hisses slightly as the chemical reacts with the copper.
BATMAN (O.S.) (CONT'D)
Good. Two more.
INT. BATCAVE
We see Batgirl on the monitor. She's not looking directly at the camera but a little behind it. The image streaks and blurs and cuts to static.
INT. THERAPY ROOM 17
EDITH
The surveillance cameras in
that area had broken down
years ago. What happened?
Harley hesitates.
HARLEY
Look, Doc, I don't want you
to think I'm crazy.
Edith hesitates.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
But my superego stopped me.
EDITH
Your... superego?
HARLEY
Swear on my mother's life...
wherever she is.
EDITH
OK. Just to be clear - you
mean to say you saw a
physical manifestation of
your superego?
HARLEY
Yep. Saw her as plain as I
see you now.
EDITH
So, what did your superego
look like?
285.
Harley laughs.
HARLEY
Oh, you wouldn't believe
it, Doc! She looks like
Batman except she's a
little girl!
Edith's eyes narrow.
EDITH
(sharp-edged)
A little girl?
Harley laughs harder, oblivious to Edith's reaction.
HARLEY
I swear, Doc, she's all
dressed up like the big,
bad Bat but she's tiny!
Edith's lips are a thin line. She looks down at the file and begins writing.
EDITH
(under her breath)
A little girl. A little
girl dressed like Batman.
A Bat... girl.
She clears her throat as Harley's laughter dies down.
EDITH (CONT'D)
So what did your superego
say to you? To stop you
from escaping.
HARLEY
Oh, she didn't say nothin',
she just hit me.
EDITH
And did she hit like a
little girl?
HARLEY
Oh, no, she rung my bell,
Doc.
EDITH
Good. I mean, it's good
that your superego is
strong. Because you are
capable of such incredible
things and your superego
can help direct you into
using that ability in a
more positive way.
HARLEY
Yeah! Thanks, Doc.
26.
Edith scoops up the file as she stands.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
Oh, Doc, what about my meds?
EDITH
I'm still waiting on a
toxicology report. I'll
let you know.
Edith walks to the door, knocking a bit more forcefully than usual.
INT. EDITH'S OFFICE - DAY
Edith walks in beaming her usual sincere smile. It drops to a scowl the second the door closes. She slaps the file down on the desk and her glasses down on top of the file. She begins to pace angrily.
BATMAN (O.S.)
Are-
She whirls on the camera, her hands on her hips.
EDITH
A little girl! That's what
I look like! A little girl
playing dress-up.
She goes back to pacing.
BATMAN (O.S.)
Well-
She whirls on the camera again, this time stabbing a finger towards it.
EDITH
And even if I was your
age, even if I do this
for as long as you have,
that is all they are ever
going to see!
She lowers her finger and looks down, fuming. After a pause:
BATMAN (O.S.)
Your stature can be an
advantage. It gives people
a false sense of security.
She looks at the camera again.
27.
EDITH
(sarcastically)
Oh, thanks!
She points at the camera again.
EDITH (CONT'D)
You and I both know that
this-
She points at her chest.
EDITH (CONT'D)
-is supposed to inspire
fear! Not a false sense
of security!
She turns away from the camera, breathing hotly.
BATMAN (O.S.)
I was laughed at a few
times in the beginning.
It isn't the suit that
scares them, it's the
reputation. Some day the
name 'Batgirl' will
inspire just as much fear
as the name 'Batman'.
Edith sighs, her shoulders relax. She turns to the camera again.
EDITH
Fine. Maybe I'm overreacting.
BATMAN (O.S.)
Now, if we could change the
subject... why on Earth did
you suggest group therapy?
Edith chuckles and smirks.
EDITH
A better question is why on
Earth was she trying to
manipulate me into
suggesting it.
BATMAN (O.S.)
She wasn't able to escape on
her own and is trying to get
help.
EDITH
And when they're all in the
room and I'm not, or one of
them is distracting me and
they're able to whisper to
each other, you will be
watching their every move
and hearing their every word.
28.
BATMAN (O.S.)
Giving them a false sense
of security.
Edith picks up her glasses and leans back against her desk.
BATMAN (O.S.) (CONT'D)
Hmm. Well, you convinced
me; how are you going to
convince Leland?
She taps her glasses on the desk as she thinks and points them at the camera when she has an idea.
EDITH
Maybe for the first step
I don't need to. Who is
Nygma's doctor?
There is a pause.
BATMAN (O.S.)
Roiland.
Edith nods and puts on her glasses as she walks to the door.
INT. DR. ROILAND'S OFFICE - DAY
DR. ROILAND is a portly, bald man in his late fifties. He wears a tweed suit, the jacket of which is slung across the back of his chair as he sits at his desk working on a laptop. There is a KNOCK at the door and he looks at it over the top of his black-rimmed glasses.
ROILAND
Yes? Come in.
Edith peeks her head in, smiling.
EDITH
Dr. Roiland, do you have
a minute?
Roiland smiles and pushes the glasses to the top of his head.
ROILAND
Edith, come in!
She steps in, closing the door behind her.
ROILAND (CONT'D)
Or is it 'Doc Laffs' now?
They both chuckle.
29.
EDITH
Oh, Doc is as good a name
as any, though it can be
confusing when speaking
with other doctors.
He laughs and smiles good-naturedly; we get the impression it is his natural state of being.
ROILAND
What can I do for you, my
dear?
EDITH
I understand Edward Nygma
is a patient of yours?
Roiland's face falls aghast and his shoulders slump in defeat.
ROILAND
Oh, Lord, what has he done
now?
EDITH
Oh! No, nothing! As you
know, Harley Quinn is my
newest patient and they
have such a history
together I thought it
might be good for them
both to have a group
session.
ROILAND
Harley Quinn and Edward
Nygma?
EDITH
Has he ever mentioned her
during his sessions? She
could hardly talk about
anything else today!
ROILAND
Oh, I don't see him. I
just check his blood
levels once a week to
make sure he's taking
his medication.
Edith is taken aback.
EDITH
But... he's in Maximum
Security! He doesn't
even leave his cell for
meals. Surely he requires
some treatment beyond
medication?
Roiland sighs sadly.
30.
ROILAND
Edith, I don't want to
sound patronizing. But the
truth is, you are young
and inexperienced. I'm
afraid some of the inmates
here, such as Nygma, are
simply deemed untreatable.
It is our primary function
in those cases to keep them
separate from the pulic and
as comfortable as we can.
And in the specific case of
Edward Nygma, I'm afraid
Maximum Security is the
only place that fits the
bill.
Edith crosses her arms in front of herself.
EDITH
Maybe the case just needs
a fresh pair of eyes.
Roiland chuckles.
ROILAND
That sounds like a very
kind way of calling me
old. (beat) Very well.
He opens the bottom drawer of his desk and pulls out a file as thick as a phone book. He sets it in front of her. Her eyes widen at the sight of it.
ROILAND (CONT'D)
You really are a lot like
her. The last person
hopeful enough - and brave
enough - to think that she
wanted that file.
EDITH
That sounds like a very
kind way of calling me
foolish.
He chuckles as she picks up the file.
ROILAND
Good luck, Doc Laffs.
INT. EDITH'S OFFICE
Edith sets the large file on her desk and sits down.
31.
EDITH
This is the part about being the world's greatest detective that everyone fails to fantasize about. The actual detective work.
She pushes the glasses to the top of her head and opens the file.
BATMAN (O.S.)
I can save you some time. The bulk of the file is written by Nygma himself, a series of puzzles. I scanned them into the computer years ago. There are still several that neither it nor I have ever solved.
She flips to the puzzles and looks over them for a moment.
EDITH
(under her breath)
Bat-bait.
BATMAN (O.S.)
You think it's just red herring?
She drums her fingers on the desk.
EDITH
Maybe... or maybe...
She goes to the door and locks it. She pulls loose her dress and lets it fall to the floor.
BATMAN (O.S.)
What are you doing?
She flips the cape over her head and goes back to the desk, in costume except for the gauntlets.
BATGIRL
Just a hunch.
She turns the dial at her temple to change the lenses to purple and looks at the file. She smiles.
BATGIRL (CONT'D)
There it is. Invisible ink.
BATMAN (O.S.)
What does it say?
Batgirl reads for a moment and scoffs.
32.
BATGIRL
It's in code. It's invisible
and encoded?
BATMAN (O.S.)
I can't say I'm surprised.
Door.
There is a KNOCK.
BATGIRL
(as Edith)
Just a minute.
She rushes back to the door, flipping the cape forward. She pulls the dress, lab coat and all, over her head and reseals the magnetic seam at her right shoulder. She puts on her glasses and opens the door with a smile.
EDITH
Yes? Oh, hi, Jennifer!
JENNIFER
Hi, Doc Laffs. Here are the
toxicology reports you
wanted.
The nurse hands her a file.
EDITH
Oh, thank you.
She shuts the door and looks through the file.
EDITH (CONT'D)
Whoa. That is a lot of
self-medication. I can't
prescribe her anything
till this junk's out of
her system.
She sets the file on the desk next to Nygma's.
EDITH (CONT'D)
As for this, I'll run it
by the cave after work
and see what you and the
computer can make of it.
In the meantime, I'm
going to see what I can
get out of the real
herring.
INT. THERAPY ROOM 6 - DAY
This room is larger than Therapy Room 17 with more windows. The decor is the same, however, with horizontal blinds and green tile.
33.
There are several chairs, arranged in a circle, and in tow of the chairs, directly opposite each other, are Harley and Eddie in handcuffs. She is fidgeting.
HARLEY
I'm tellin' ya, Eddie,
there's something fishy
about all this. I mean,
I didn't even get halfway
through my spiel and she
just came out with it! And
there's no way Joan
approved it this fast. And
where's everybody else?
EDDIE
Just relax. Let me work my
magic.
HARLEY
Yeah, I've seen your magic
and you need a new act.
She fidgets some more.
EDDIE
What's wrong with you?
Settle down.
HARLEY
They still haven't given
me any meds!
The door is opened and Edith walks in carrying a new file.
EDITH
Hello, Mr. Nygma, I'm Dr.
Lafferty but you can call
me Doc Laffs, everyone does.
She sits in the chair nearest the door, equidistant from each of them. She opens the file in her lap and readies a pencil.
EDITH (CONT'D)
May I call you Eddie? It's
just that Harley has already
told me so much about you
that I already think of you
by that name.
Eddie smiles overenthusiastically.
EDDIE
Of course, Doc Laffs,
you're welcome to call
me Eddie. But I wouldn't
believe everything you
hear about me.
34.
EDITH
She told me you're a genius.
EDDIE
Apart from the obvious, of
course.
EDITH
She told me you tried to
blow her head off with a
shotgun.
EDDIE
For which I am deeply sorry.
Edith's eyes narrow and she drops her usual smile.
EDITH
Eddie, the only way this
is going to work is if you
stop telling me what you
think I want to hear.
Because what I really want
to hear is the truth. And
everyone in this room knows
the only thing you are
sorry about is that she was
able to duck in time.
Eddie takes some time to process this. He clears his throat.
EDDIE
You're right, Doc. I wanted
her to die. I often times
still do.
EDITH
Why did you want her to die?
Eddie fumes for a second.
EDDIE
She ruined my party.
Edith frowns and shakes her head.
EDITH
No, no, you had decided to
kill her before that. You
wanted hers to be the first
death. You see, I know
something of riddles too
and that first riddle, the
'twelve disciples' one?
I've never read it.
She pauses a moment and turns to Harley.
35.
EDITH
Harley, when you first
became Eddie's doctor, did
you make an effort to
learn riddles?
HARLEY
Yeah. Yeah, I remember I
bought a big book of
riddles and tried to
memorize a bunch so I
could impress him.
EDDIE
(sarcastically)
Impress me!
HARLEY
Gah, you are such an
insufferable little-
EDITH
Harley!
Harley settles down.
HARLEY
Sorry, Doc.
EDITH
Eddie, you wrote that
disciples riddle because
you didn't want to gamble
her death on a riddle she
might remember, right?
Eddie hesitates, his mouth moving to form words that don't come. He finally closes his mouth, his jaw fixed.
EDDIE
Yes.
EDITH
So, again, why did you
want to kill her
specifically? Before the
party even began.
Eddie looks between Edith and Harley for a moment. He eventually looks away from both.
EDDIE
Because she was a good
doctor. Too good. She made
me... feel things.
EDITH
Hmm. Kind of like I just
did. Do you want to kill
me?
36.
Eddie cuts his eyes back to Edith. Harley tries to get his attention, shaking her head slightly but urgently.
EDDIE
(through gritted teeth)
Yes.
Harley rolls her eyes. Edith nods and writes for a moment. When she looks up she turns her attention to Harley.
EDITH
Harley, why do you hate
Eddie?
Harley is surprised by the question.
HARLEY
He tried to blow my head
off with a shotgun!
EDITH
And I'm not saying that
isn't a perfectly valid
reason. But I also can't
help but feel there's more
to it than that. You see,
Dr. Leland told me the
story about how she got
the scar on her cheek. You
grabbed Two-Face's coin in
mid-flip?
Eddie is surprised by this news.
EDITH (CONT'D)
There is hardly anyone in
this city who doesn't know
that's a death sentence.
Yet from the way she tells
it, when he put his gun in
your face you didn't even
flinch.
HARLEY
Well... I'd had lots of
guns in my face by then.
EDITH
But when Eddie did it,
it was the first time,
wasn't it?
Harley seems reluctant to answer at first.
HARLEY
Yeah.
EDITH
Do you hate Two-Face as
much as you hate Eddie?
37.
Harley thinks a moment.
HARLEY
Well... I do hate him but...
no, not as much as I hate
Eddie.
EDITH
And not just for what he
did but what it did to you.
You were young,
inexperienced, maybe a
little naive... And you
can never go back to that,
can you?
HARLEY
(bitterly)
No.
EDITH
But if you hadn't changed
you would never have been
able to save Dr. Leland.
In some ways, you
actually owe him some
measure of gratitude.
Harley suddenly glares at Edith.
HARLEY
(sharply)
What?
EDITH
You were a good doctor
but he helped you to
become a great doctor.
HARLEY
(sarcastically)
Oh, you're right.
Harley turns to Eddie.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
(sarcastically)
Thank you, Eddie. Thank
you for crushing the hopes
and dreams of an idealistic
young woman who only wanted
to help you and turning her
into a bitter drunk before
her time!
Eddie's face twitches. He sniffs. He turns away, hiding his face as best he can.
38.
EDDIE
(weakly)
You're welcome.
HARLEY
(confused)
What?
EDDIE
(even weaker)
You're welcome.
Harley and Edith look confused.
EDITH
Eddie? What is it?
EDDIE
It's nothing (beat) It's
just - oh, you probably
don't remember but - we
were robbing this jewelry
store...
INT. JEWELRY STORE - YEARS AGO
Eddie and Harley are trying on jewelry.
EDDIE (V.O.)
We were trying on stuff
and having fun and you
wanted to take a picture.
And without thinking twice...
Harley sees a woman with a phone in her hand.
HARLEY
Gimme your phone.
The woman hesitates. Harley shoves her LOVE/HATE revolver in her face.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
(roaring)
Gimme your phone!
The woman shakes like a leaf in a hurricane. Harley snatches the phone and berates the woman, the gun still in her face, though we hear only Eddie's voice over.
EDDIE (V.O.)
And there was this moment
when I looked at you and I
saw me and I looked at her
and I saw you...
39.
The Eddie in the flashback looks on the scene tearfully.
EDDIE (V.O.)
(emotionally)
And I just felt such pride!
INT. THERAPY ROOM 6
Eddie is close to tears, really hamming it up. Harley rolls her eyes. Edith tries not to laugh and clears her throat.
EDITH
I'm actually really glad
you brought that up, Eddie.
Because while we've
established what was really
the root cause of your
mutual hatred, I think what
has sustained it all these
years is how incredibly
similar you both are.
Eddie drops the act in a second and both of them stare at Edith in shock.
HARLEY AND EDDIE
(in unison)
No, we're not!
Edith giggles.
EDITH
I think the two of you,
more than anyone else I've
ever seen, truly exemplify
the term 'frenemy'. Best
frenemies forever.
She goes back to writing in the file as they exchange looks of pure hatred. She looks up with a smile.
EDITH (CONT'D)
This was brief but I think
we've made some real
progress and I don't want
to push it any further right
now. And I think with these
results I'll have a better
chance of getting approval
for a larger group next
time.
Edith stands and moves toward the door.
HARLEY
Oh, wait! Doc, what about
my meds?
Edith turns with a look of apprehension on her face.
40.
EDITH
Harley, I got your
toxicology report. I'm
afraid I can't prescribe
you anything until the
medications currently in
your system have run their
course. It should only
take about a week.
HARLEY
(horrified)
A week?
EDITH
Fortunately, your best
frenemy will be in the
next cell to keep you
company.
Harley looks at Eddie, who grins back at her.
EDDIE
Yes, you will be under
constant observation.
Unfortunately, no sedation
can be administered.
Harley shakes in fury as Eddie shakes in barely suppressed laughter.
INT. MAXIMUM SECURITY CORRIDOR
Harley and Eddie are led down the corridor, their hands cuffed behind their backs. They step into their cells before being uncuffed and keep their backs to the doors until they close. The guards walk back down the corridor. Harley turns toward Eddie.
HARLEY
Wow, that was a whole new
Doc Laffs! She's good,
right?
Eddie turns away with a dismissive wave of his hand.
EDDIE
Oh, you quacks are all
alike! You don't have the
stomach to be real doctors
so you just use words.
He walks away from the door and we hear him THUMP on his bed.
HARLEY
Hey, Eddie, remember that
riddle I told at the party?
The 'moment in time' one?
41.
EDDIE (O.C.)
Yeah?
HARLEY
I wrote that one, too. Just
made it up on the spot.
She grins.
HARLEY (CONT'D)
How long tht 'disciples' one
take ya, huh?
There is a pause.
EDDIE (O.C.)
Fuck you, Quinn. Enjoy your
withdrawals.
HARLEY
Fuck you, too, Eddie. Good
night.
She laughs as she goes toward her own bed.
INT. EDITH'S OFFICE - DUSK
Edith is typing on a laptop, her glasses at the top of her head.
BATMAN (O.S.)
What are you working on?
EDITH
An email to Leland. The
results of today's group
session and a petition for
a larger one including a
few of your best frenemies.
BATMAN (O.S.)
The term is 'worst enemies';
there's nothing friendly
about them. (beat) I
couldn't help notice that
you departed from your usual
mannerisms in that group
session. Be careful not to
slip out of your alias.
Edith stops typing and looks at the camera.
EDITH
I'm not slipping. Edith
Lafferty is the alias you
invented. Doc Laffs is the
alias I'm inventing.
(MORE)
42.
EDITH (CONT'D)
She can't stay naive forever.
And this group would eat her
alive.
BATMAN (O.S.)
Still, be careful no to let
too much of yourself into
the role. It would be
suspicious for you to change
too much too fast and
dangerous for anyone to
suspect who you really are.
She nods.
EDITH
I understand.
She glances out the window and notices that it's getting dark. She closes the laptop.
EDITH (CONT'D)
I didn't notice it had
gotten so late; I can
finish this in the morning.
I'll be by with the Nygma
file in about an hour.
She takes a briefcase from beside her desk and loads the file and laptop into it.
INT. OFFICE HALLWAY - NIGHT
Edith, wearing a long coat instead of her lab coat and holding the briefcase in her hand, locks the door to her office. Behind her Charlie, Brian, and Barney are walking and talking as they move down the hall.
CHARLIE
I'm telling you, she was
right in front of me! A
Batwoman.
BRIAN
You're telling me the guy
that picked me up was a
woman? No, no, I heard him
talk, it was a guy! You need
to get your eyes checked.
CHARLIE
You need to get your hearing
checked because it was a
woman...
43.
They continue to talk as they move out of earshot. Edith turns toward them with a smile, then turns and walks down the hall with her head held high.
FADE OUT: